Oblivion
by Swanandapirate
Summary: The disadvantage of being great friends with someone of the opposite gender is that people often misinterpret it. What happens if it's your boss who thinks that you're in a relationship and you, unintentionally, confirm her suggestions?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Here is my CSSS gift to leiandcharles. I had a blast getting to know her and I hope she enjoys her good old Fake Dating AU with the addition of some angst (maybe a little more than she bargained for don't hate me please) This is part 1 of 5 and the rest will be posted over the next few weeks. Merry Christmas and happy holidays!**

"Emma, over here." He waves at her. She's looking radiant and flashes her teeth in a bewitching smile.

"Hey." She zips her leather jacket open and hangs it over the chair. Killian waits until she sits down before sitting down himself.

"Have you been here long?" He says when the sound of their chairs being shoved under the table is gone.

"No, only ten minutes." He hands her a menu. "Graham stood us up. He said he wasn't finished with work yet, but seeing that you're here, I think that the female voice in the background might have something to do with that."

Emma chuckles.

"So, it's just us then."

"What about Mary Margaret and David?"

Emma shakes her head and her long, blond locks copy the movement.

"Theo is sick and they didn't want to put the babysitter through his constant and demanding cries."

"Understandable, we'll have to make it a great evening with us two." He had already ordered 3 glasses of wine and a water (Mary Margaret can't drink yet) so he hands her one, takes the other and clinks them together.

Emma Swan and he have been friends since university. She studied criminology, he studied psychology and they met because his mate David fell in love with Mary Margaret, Emma's friend. To say that they didn't connect at first is an understatement. There was an incident with hot coffee and a white sweater that Killian will never forget. Or let's say that Emma will never let him forget. After being forced to spend time with each other by the true love couple, they discovered some common interest and the rest is history. There is also the fact that he's madly in love with her but that's at most mildly significant.

They keep talking until long after their food is devoured.

"Wait? She comes to school in fur?"

"Yes! And I'm quite sure it isn't faux."

Killian started a new job last month. He is now the school counselor of Storybrooke High. The work he does with the children is so fulfilling. When he actually helps one of the students and they thank him, he's reminded that this is the job for him.

"I think I, for one, am going to stick with leather"

Killian smiles.

"Please do, it looks good on you." A wink is thrown at her and she makes a hissing sound.

"Watch it, buddy" Emma can be one of the most scary people he has ever met, but now the amusing look on her face only warms his heart. He raises his hands in defense.

"Sorry, lass, but I was merely stating a fact." Killian doesn't miss the little blush that forms on her cheeks. She stands up and he follows towards the exit. The evening sky is colored by little lightbulbs hung everywhere. Orange mixed with pink and just an odd purple one. The colors of a perfect sunset.

"It's gorgeous." The colors are softly reflected on Emma's hair. He replies.

"Aye, that it is. Care for a walk home?"

"I'm not saying no to that." They walk alongside each other in a comfortable silence when a voice shouts:

"Darling!" Talk about the devil. Killian doesn't even have to think for a second before knowing who is calling him. Her perfume can be smelled from a mile afar and, even through to the distance, overwhelms Killian. Emma looks at him and raises her eyebrows. He nods to confirm her silent question.

"Principal DeVil, I am delighted to see you."

"Oh, call me Cruella. We are not in school." How much fur can a woman wear? "And who might this be?" His boss turns to Emma, who's standing next to him.

"This is Emma. Emma, this is the principal of Storybrooke High." A gloved hand stretches out and stops right before Emma. She grabs it with caution and shortly shakes it.

"Nice to meet you." They all stand there for some time, while Cruella keeps talking about Dalmatians and how they are the most noble breed of dog. Emma looks at him and he nearly bursts out in laughter. He uses a cough to disguise his slip.

"Oh, Killian. Would you look at the time. I have to get home, I have the early shift tomorrow. It was good meeting you, but I'm afraid we need to go." Emma throws a quick smile at the woman and turns around.

"See you on Monday." Killian adds and he follows. After they turn the corner they both start laughing uncontrollably. In between giggles Emma asks:

"That's your boss?"

"The one and only." The laughter continues.

"Oh god, my side hurts." She puts her hand just below her ribs. The hilarity quiets down "But I do have the early shift tomorrow, so I'm gonna go. Thanks for walking me almost home."

"You are welcome, lass. I'll see you next week?"

"Yes, hopefully in company of the others. Good night, Killian."

"Night, Emma. Get home safely." They part ways. Killian doesn't want to admit it but he actually does want their friends to cancel next week. This was an amazing night and he'd not be against spending more like this.

Killian is eating lunch in the teachers' lounge and chatting with Belle, the English teacher, about the effect literature can have on an adolescent's life.

"Darling." Killian sighs internally. Not again. He only wants to eat his lunch in peace. "Can I see you in my office?" Belle looks curiously at him.

"I'll tell you later." he says while standing up. He follows the, quite frankly, terrible hairdo and takes a seat in her black, white and red office.

"I was so glad to encounter you yesterday that I have decided to invite you and the blonde to dinner at my house. I'd like to get to know you properly." Cruella directly goes to the point, she isn't one for beating around the bush.

"Emma?" He's confused. Why would she want to see Emma?

"Yes, her. I want to get acquainted with your sweetheart." Oh no. This isn't good.

"Sorry, but-" he wants to explain. She interrupts him with a stare. A frightening one.

"No buts. I'm expecting you two at my house Friday at 7. I'll mail you the address and don't be late."

"Alright" he answers automatically. He freezes on his chair and by the time he tries to rectify his mistake, it's too late. Principal DeVil has already left her office. Bloody hell. Emma is going to kill him.

"Wait what? You said we were dating?"

"Well, she said it. I just didn't deny it." Her eyes widen as soon as he admits it. He feels her angry glare. "But look, she was sounding so regal and made me feel really uneasy, and she's my boss, and I panicked and she wants us to come dine with her." The speed of his words has become even faster than usual. His attempt at self defense doesn't work on her.

"Killian!" she exclaims astounded. "I-we can't- No! You have to tell her that it's not true." Killian scrunches his face.

"DeVil already invited us. She's the principal, Swan. It wouldn't really make that great of an impression if I lied."

"You didn't lie. Not in theory. Besides you actually want to pretend that we're dating?" He takes a sip of his drink. They are at Emma's apartment. Killian had come barging in right after the school day was finished to inform her of the recent events.

"Swan, I am begging you here. I'll even go on my knees. It's only for one dinner. She doesn't have to see you any other time." He pouts his lips and uses his puppy eyes. Emma sighs.

"Alright. I'm doing this once." Killian nods. This must be a record time for the trick to work."And you are buying me dinner for the next two months."

A dazzling smile appears on his face.

"It's a fair trade. Thank you, Swan. You are a true savior."

She rolls her eyes.

"Yeah, sure."

* * *

Emma is going through her wardrobe. What should she wear to dinner with a very special woman? She has been wondering why she even agreed to this in the first place. It is not necessary to speculate, she already knows the answer. Killian. If anyone had told her 6 years ago that she would go out on a date with the guy that spilled warm coffee over her beautiful and favorite sweater, she would laugh right in their face. Would you look at her now. She has to remind herself that it isn't an actual date. It's a onetime thing and after this, they'll go right back to being friends or whatever they are. There is a little too much sexual tension for them to be just that, according to her. Her ringtone goes off. She glances at the screen and sees the black pixie cut. Just the person she needs.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Emma. How are you?"

"I'm good, Mary Margaret. How are you guys? Is Theo feeling better?" The Nolan baby is the cutest baby Emma has ever seen and that means something because Emma generally doesn't find babies that appealing. Theo has these big green eyes and blond fuzzy hair on his crane. He is too precious.

"We are all great. Theo is fully recovered."

"Great! Listen, I have a question for you."

Mary Margaret replies in an instant.

"Shoot."

"You know what I have in my closet, right?" She hears a confirming hum on the other end of the line.

"More or less."

"Okay what should I wear to a casual, but not so casual dinner?"

"The dark green dress." Her friend says without missing a beat. "You should also put your hair up. It makes you look graceful." Emma clenches the phone between her shoulder and head and her hands sort through the hangers.

"Found it! Thanks, Mary Margaret." There is no reply. Did their call end? No, Emma can still hear David's voice babbling to Theo in the background. She's still there. "What?"

"Aren't you going to tell me with whom you're going out?"

"No one."

"Emma." There it is. The mom voice. They have the same age but Mary Margaret always likes to be the mother hen and she sometimes pretends that Emma is the little chick (or duckling in this case). Emma has grown used to it.

"Mary Margaret..."

"Come on."

"It's Killian."

"You're going on a date with Killian?!" Mary Margaret's surprise is so big that she almost yells. Emma startles and nearly drops her phone.

"She's what?" A heavy voice joins the conversation.

"She's going on a date with Killian." Mary Margaret says while putting her hand on the microphone. It doesn't work because Emma can still hear David's reply:

"Doesn't surprise me that much."

She has to put a stop to this.

"Guys, it's not an actual date. His boss thinks we're together and he didn't want to disappoint her." Theo's sounds are the only thing Emma hears.

"Emma, do you really think that's such a good idea?" David finally says.

"Why not? I'm just helping Killian out." The happy noises the baby was making, have turned into cries. Mary Margaret shushes.

"Easy, Theo. Mommy is coming." She addresses Emma again. "We need to go. Emma, just be careful, okay?"

"I will. Bye." She taps the red phone.

What could they mean by be careful? It's only Killian. What could go wrong?

After having a real struggle with the zipper of her dress, Emma slips into her shoes, searches for a necklace and is ready to leave. Killian said he would come and pick her up at 6:40pm, so he should be here soon. She suddenly remembers Mary Margaret's guideline and walks back to her mirror. She should have a pin in here somewhere. Aha, gotcha. She grabs her hair and puts it up. The bell rings and she takes the last loose lock and puts it in place. She's happy with the way she looks. It's classy but at ease. Right? Her hands get clammy. Why is she nervous? She takes a calming breath before opening the door. Emma is greeted by a grin. The leather has disappeared and instead he is wearing a costume jacket.

"Swan, you look stunning."

"You look..."

He smirks

"I know." A rose appears from behind his back. Before Emma can comment on it, he elaborates. "It's not every day that I get to take my fake girlfriend to a dinner." He offers it and she accepts.

"Thank you."

"We better get going, milady. If you care to join me?" His hand is waiting on hers.

"We're not there yet, keep the act for the dinner." Emma walks past him.

The entire drive is quiet. Emma toys with the small, green pendant around her neck like the drop will provide a distraction. The silence is broken when he asks her some questions to ease the tension, but her answers are always short. They pull up on the driveway and Killian turns to her.

"Emma, are you sure that you're alright with this? We can just go back home." She shakes her head.

"No, I got in a dress and wore heels for this. We're doing it." The light illuminates when she opens the car door. The first thing she notices is the enormous house. It is so much more than a house. She should call it a mansion. How can a school principal afford this? The second thing she notices: other cars. Not two or three, like you would expect the owner of this mansion to have, but at least fifteen vehicles are parked on the small stones. She hears Killian join her.

"Wasn't it supposed to be just dinner?"

"That's what she said." Killian seems to be as lost as she is. She carefully walks towards the door. It's a living hell on her heels with this ground, but she somehow reaches the front.

"You ready?" Killian asks her.

"Ready as I'll ever be."

Killian pulls the bell and Emma notices his silver thumb ring. He has taken of his necklace, but his ring remains. She has never seen him without it and, if she remembers right, he even sleeps with it. Is there a story connected that he hasn't told? Loud music suddenly starts and when Emma looks back at the front door, the eccentric (let's call her that) woman is welcoming them.

"Darlings, I am so happy you could make it." The woman gives them both air kisses. "Emma was it?" Emma nods, a bit taken aback by all the grandness and excess of the room before her. Cruella takes a step back to look them over. "I adore your outfit. The only thing missing is a bit of pelt." She exhales cigarette smoke. "And my dear Mr. Jones. I must confess that you look dashing." Killian smiles at her.

"Thank you, Cruella. I did think this was only a dinner?"

"Oh, it is. I invited some friends over for a small party." Emma looks around and sees no sign of a "small party." She counts 30 people only from her spot at the entrance. There is a live band playing the most jazzy songs, that go back all the way to the roaring twenties. The room is partially dimmed and there are yellow lights hanging in every corner of the room. There is an actual fountain standing in the middle of the room with rose petals drifting in the water. In black and white dressed waiters are circling the room with trays filled with champagne.

"Enter and enjoy yourselves!" Cruella vanishes again and they walk in.

"Wow." Killian mutters and Emma agrees.

"This is amazing. I was wondering before: do school principals earn this much? Because otherwise I think I need to consider a career switch." He chuckles.

"No, they most definitely don't. I had the same exact thought when I received the address so I did some research. I discovered some very interesting things." Emma is curious and wants to know more about this Cruella DeVil figure.

"Like?" She insists. Killian's mouth curls.

"Apparently she married an author called Isaac Heller a couple of years ago. He was very successful, wrote some novels and even got some recognition. I asked Belle about him and she did indeed know his work. So one day, Isaac came home with an advance for his new book and full of joy, he got inebriated and tumbled down the stairs. He never wrote another word because he died at once." She looks at the stairs with a panicked gaze. "I haven't even told you the scary part. A month before he was no more, Cruella applied for a life insurance for her dear husband and now she has the funds to last a lifetime." Emma shivers. Why did Killian take her here if he knows all of this? She glances over to the hostess. "Swan, it's just a rumor." Killian smiles. She hits him in the shoulder and he yelps.

"A rumor you didn't need to tell me!"

"Swan, you really hurt me."

"Oh stop whining." Emma isn't having it. He dragged her here.

"Is there trouble in paradise?" A woman joins them. She has been standing not far from them for a while and has followed the little display. As the lady's white dress catches the light, the complicated design becomes visible. Small, individual crystals are embedded into the fabric and shimmer whenever the woman moves. Emma wants to reply that it isn't what it looks. They're not actually together. Until she remembers. The point is to convince these people and Cruella that they are.

"He was being an idiot." Emma puts on her nice face and responds to the woman's remark. The light haired woman laughs.

"Oh, if you'd be so kind. I think there are some more of those running around in here. You have my approval." The forced smile on Emma's face becomes authentic.

"I'm the only idiot she gets to punch sadly enough." Killian lays his hand on her back and she nearly punches him again. But she can't because they are in love, remember? "Pleased to meet you. I'm Killian and this is Emma." Her name quickly gets an apposition assigned to it. "My girlfriend." It's the first time that she has ever heard Killian say the word girlfriend in the possessive form. She knows that he has had relationships in the past six years but somehow, they haven't talked about them. She has only had failed relationship after failed relationship in those years. Most of them didn't even deserve the name relationship. They nearly always consisted of a one night stand and an awkward breakfast, if it even got that far. There was also Walsh, the furniture maker. She was about to accept his proposal when she found out that he was employed by one of the biggest criminals in town. Not to mention the criminal that Emma put in jail: Zelena. Emma didn't have to think a second before locking him up as well.

"I'm Ingrid. So what are you two doing here? I would think you would prefer a quiet evening at home instead of all of this." Her hand gestures to the women in sparkly dresses and men in fine tailored suits chatting away, probably about the things they've recently done with all the money they have.

"You are right, but you see, Cruella is my boss and she invited me. I couldn't really say no, could I?"

"Really? Are you a teacher?" Killian shakes his head.

"School counselor." He looks proud. He had struggled for a long time before he knew what he wanted to do. Emma is happy that he found something that he loves doing this much. Ingrid turns to Emma.

"Do you also work in the school?"

"No, I don't. I do something completely different. I'm a sheriff's deputy."

"And a bloody brilliant one, might I add." The blush creeps up on her cheeks. She wants to put her hands on her warm face to cool it off a bit, but that would be too obvious.

"You, shush." She insist by looking at him.

"Emma, I'm your boyfriend. I should be allowed to compliment you." She's been here 20 minutes and this is already too much.

"Yeah, yeah."

Ingrid is clearly amused, but before she can make another comment, Killian is called.

"Killian, darling. I want to introduce you to some people." How does this woman slip darling in every sentence she says?

"Swan, are you coming with?" Ha, like she's doing that.

"Oh no, but she wants you, darling." She uses Cruella's accent to pronounce the last word. His face becomes alarmed.

"Emma..."

"See you soon." She waves her hand in goodbye and smiles victoriously.

"Karma is a bitch." she says to herself.

Ingrid laughs out loud with her comment and Emma joins her.

"Poor him. Cruella is going to eat him alive."

"He deserves it." Suddenly, she smells food. It has been nearly 7 hours since she has eaten and her stomach is claiming attention.

"You want to grab something to eat?" Ingrid reads her mind and Emma nods.

"Yes, please." There is a huge buffet with cooks lined behind. What does she want? There is so much choice. After another 10 minutes of doubt, she finally chooses her meal and walks towards the stretched table. The chairs are made from a nearly black kind of wood and have a soft, red pillow in the middle. She takes a seat next to Ingrid.

Her look searches for Killian but there still isn't any sign of him when her food is nearly finished.

"Don't worry. I'm sure he'll return shortly."

"Of course."

"Are you the only deputy here?" Ingrid attempts to make some small talk.

"Yes, it's only me. And my boss Graham, who's the sheriff, of course. We have a great time working together and we're also good friends outside of work."

"That's nice. I'm not from here, so I don't really know how everything happens in Storybrooke."

"Where are you from?"

"I live a bit more remote. In the mountains." Emma is pleasantly surprised. Who would expect someone that comes to these parties to live in the middle of nature.

"And you came all the way here?"

"Cruella and I go far back and I have turned down her invitations so many times that I had to accept one. This way I'm good for at least another year, or maybe even two, of declining."

"You're not a partygoer either, are you?"

Ingrid shows that Emma's right.

"Definitely not. I prefer solitude and nature over this any day."

"I'm exactly the same. Killian partially forced me to come here tonight, so I did, but this all is a bit too much for me." The lady sitting next to her and Emma have a lot in common, it seems.

"You two are a cute couple." There is the blush again. "How did you meet?"

"College. Friends of us became a couple and introduced us." This part is easy. She only has to tell the truth.

"So it's because of them you're together?"

"Not really." She starts telling the story of the coffee and the sweater. Of how she hated him for the first few months and that the feeling was mutual.

"And then?" Ingrid is fascinated by Emma's story.

"Nothing."

Ingrid's shocked.

"What?"

"We became friends but nothing happened." Okay, now she has to create a story of how they both fell in love. How is she going to do that? She pauses while trying to make up something when she feels two hands on her shoulders. Killian's face appears above her head.

"I'll tell her. I've always been the narrator of us two." The chair next to Emma is still empty and Killian takes a seat there. He smoothly takes over. "About two years after the incident, I am certain Emma told you all about it, I saw her again in the same coffeehouse but with a guy next to her and I felt so jealous. At first I couldn't comprehend why that was. We were friends but nothing more than that. Then it became clear. He was the one who stole her heart and I wanted to be that person. I never knew I felt that way, but she was with someone else so I buried it under everything I could possibly do." Two years later… That meant that the man she was with then was Walsh. Yes, it was maybe one of their first dates. "He eventually broke her heart and I felt livid. He had it and he tore it apart. The next month or so I tried to support Emma, to be her foundation and one day we both got intoxicated. We sang and we watched movies together and it was an amazing evening. She fell asleep on my shoulder and I tucked her in and went to sleep on the couch. The next morning she woke up, radiant as ever and made breakfast. She was telling me how she didn't know how she managed to reach her bed. I told her. She walked over and kissed me. I can't even express how happy I was in that moment. The woman I loved was in my arms and it was everything I ever needed." He looks over to her, but she is focused on the pasta leftovers on her plate.

"Wow, I mean. You made me tear up, Killian. That is a beautiful story." Ingrid takes the white napkin, that is lying on the table, and uses it to dab just below her eyelids.

"Excuse me." Emma abruptly stands up and walks away. She needs some air. There is a long hallway before her and after glancing behind her, she enters a room. Red curtains are drifting with a soft movement and she goes towards them. A balcony. The crisp air hits her skin and she takes a deep breath. Why is she freaking out? It was only a story, made up to fool everyone. She knows what's bothering her. The first part of what Killian told was true. They went out and drank lots and lots of rum. They ended up at her apartment and watched Tangled and that's where the memory stops for her. The next morning she woke up in her bed, not knowing how she got there. When she got out, Killian was gone. She just figured that he walked home that same night and that she somehow reached her bedroom on her own, but now that Killian told his story, her mind is blurred. Emma has cooled off and goosebumps appear on her arms. She rubs them, an attempt to heat them up.

"I thought you quit smoking." He has found her.

"I did."

"Why are you here, then?" He steps on the balcony. Emma raises her shoulders.

"I was a bit overwhelmed by the music and the lights and everything here."

"Comprehensible, it's quite a happening. These people pretend like this is prevalent but it really isn't. Well everyone with the exception of Ingrid. She's more grounded like us." He smiles. Emma runs her thumb over the smooth surface of the necklace on her neck. The wind is loosening her hair and she grabs a lock. Her hand leaves her pendant and rearranges a hairpin. Emma doesn't answer.

"Do you want to return home?" To be honest, she did. This evening has resurfaced a lot and this is really not the time for suppressed feelings. Admitting that she wants to go home will raise suspicions with Killian and that's the last thing she wants.

"No, I'm already feeling better." She turns around and Killian moves the curtain away so that they can pass. "What did Cruella do to keep you so long?"

"She introduced me to all of her single, rich friends as "the most prized of her employees" and of course they all had to know everything about my work with the children and my life. I'm happy that we're doing this because now I could just tell them I am in a relationship. The fondness swiftly stopped, for some part." Cruella using Killian as her boy toy, that is something that doesn't surprise Emma at all. They reach the long table again and Ingrid is still sitting there.

"Everything alright?" Emma smiles with reassurance and Ingrid is relieved. They sit back down.

"So you live in the mountains, Emma told me." Killian gets the conversation going again.

"I do. I have my residence there. It's a bit more... humble than this place but it is more than I need." Ingrid tells about how it is to live in the middle of nature and how she copes with the cold. Emma is having fun and even when Ingrid says something and Killian kisses his fake girlfriend on the cheek as a reply, she manages to pretend like she is okay with it all and that she is in love with Killian. It doesn't take much effort to achieve that last thing.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Happy New Year everyone! May your year be filled with amazing moments.**

Killian wakes up and looks at the clock. He slept in but that's all right because last evening was extended into the early hours. He is amazed that Emma and he actually made a friend at the party. They talked for quite some time and when the music became more tranquil, Ingrid urged them to dance. He looked at Emma to see if she was up to it but he couldn't really read her. She did stand up so Killian figured that she was all right with it. They softly swayed on the music. His hand on her waist and hers on his shoulder. The only thing that could be heard were the violins. It wasn't the first time that Emma and he danced. They had during David and Mary Margaret's wedding. According to the bride, it was tradition for the maid of honor and the best man to share a dance and to join the newlyweds right after their opening dance. Killian was unaware of this custom but had nothing against it, Emma on the other hand. It took 20 minutes to convince her and Mary Margaret had to remind her several times that it was their wedding day. Emma finally conceded and reluctantly followed him to the dance floor.

"Are you saying you actually know how to do… whatever this is." She gestured towards the joined couple.

"It's called a waltz and there's only one rule: pick a partner who knows what he's doing."

They danced and after a while Emma started to enjoy herself. They laughed and conversed and when the sound of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody blasted out of the boxes, everyone, including Emma, went mad. He suspected that that was David's influence on the wedding playlist. Emma's behavior then suffered a big contrast with Emma yesterday. She was tensed and kept to herself. Killian didn't know what to do with this pensive mood of hers. After the song ended, they returned to Ingrid and chatted some more. She was the first to leave because she had a long trip ahead of her tomorrow. They both received a hug from the woman and they all said their goodbyes. Ingrid had made their evening at his boss's mansion much more pleasurable. He was very thankful for that. Right after Ingrid left, Emma wanted to go home as well and so they did. They, actually Killian, seeing that Emma had consumed her fair share of champagne, drove to Emma's flat and Killian even asked if he needed to come upstairs with her. With a determined shake of her head she said no and got out the car, her black heels in hand. Her bare feet walked over the concrete towards the door. She fished her keys out of her purse and opened the door. Killian waited outside until she was inside and was secretly hoping on a wave or even a goodnight, but she kept her back turned and stepped inside the building. He had no other choice but to drive home, slightly disappointed.

* * *

His schedule for today is completely clear except for dinner, so he takes his time brushing his teeth, showering and dressing himself. There are a few files of pupils he counsels that need to be updated. He takes his bag and grabs the needed folders. There aren't that many people who consult him. Most of the stops made in his office are to complain about things such as that one teacher that doesn't like them or to ask about possibilities for the future. There are more severe cases. For example children with problems at home or who don't feel at ease on the school grounds. He always tries to give aid to those who need it and his door is always open for them. He genuinely took a liking for the youngsters that came to him and he has even spent quite some lunch pauses eating with one of them in his office. He is expected to keep a record of any evolution a student makes. Teachers can consult the files, but Killian prefers that teachers talk to him before forming conclusions off of a piece of paper. The children are so much more than that. That's why, when he adds something to a file, he always tries to depict their personality and behavior as detailed as possible. It might take longer to do that but it can only bring advantages to everyone involved. He has spent a lot of afternoons writing just like he spends this one.

The restaurant's lights are shining in the distance and Killian slowly approaches. When he arrives, Graham is already sitting at their usual table.

"Hello mate. You didn't cancel on us this time, I see."

"No, I finished all of my work in advance today."

Graham has used that cover story far too many times already. Nearly every time he cancels "work" is his excuse but he somehow forgets that Emma and he are colleagues and that she is very aware of the things that go on at the sheriff's station.

"I am curious. How much of that work involves a lass?"

A nervous smile appears on the sheriff's face.

"The lady only came in to file a complaint."

"Oh really, that is serendipitous. Because if I recall correctly, the same voice was also there when I called you on Monday." Killian knows that the lady is more than just a woman. He's curious to hear the tale.

"Who is she?"

Graham grimaces.

"You are not supposed to know yet. I was planning to introduce her during Christmas."

"Graham, you wouldn't have lasted another two weeks. Emma knows, I know and, knowing Mary Margaret, she surely knows. You weren't all that subtle." He grins. Graham is holding his face in his hands.

"I really thought I was." he mutters between his fingers. Killian laughs even louder.

"I hope you are better at investigating than you are at concealing, mate, because otherwise Storybrooke might have a problem." A groan escapes out of his friend's mouth. Killian stops chuckling and reassures his friend. "Graham, it doesn't matter. I'm joyful you are happy and we'd love to meet her over Christmas." Killian looks up when he spots David walking in. Mary Margaret follows not long after.

"Hey guys." They all smile and the couple takes a seat.

"Let's order because I'm starving." Mary Margaret says while getting rid of her pastel coat.

"Shouldn't we wait on Emma?" Killian finds it a bit rude to start without her.

"She didn't tell you? She's not coming. She's feeling sick." Killian is hearing brand new information.

"No, I had no idea. That's too bad. I think I'll drop by her flat with some healing substance. Maybe she could use some company."

"You shouldn't." Graham says, the embarrassment no longer visible. "She has the flu and she has ordered everyone to stay away from her." Apparently everyone except for him because he wasn't even aware that she was ill. She most likely caught it from standing on that balcony with only a short dress. He wanted to offer his jacket to her but before he could, she already returned back inside.

"I'll just send her a text." It's the only thing he can do really if she doesn't want to see anyone. Or him.

"Hello, this is Killian Jones. Who am I speaking with?"

"Hello Killian. It's Ingrid. From the party at Cruella's."

"Aye, I remember." It's been a week since the party and he's sitting in his office.

"I hope you don't mind me calling you like this. Cruella was so kind to share your number with me." Ingrid says. It doesn't surprise him that much. He should have a talk with the principal about this. He has received some rather strange texts from unknown numbers and he has a feeling miss DeVil might have something to do with them.

"No, I don't mind. What can I do for you?" He stops writing and puts the cap back on his blue fountain pen.

"I had quite a great time getting to know you and Emma last Friday." Killian's mouth forms a small smile.

"We did too."

"Oh, that's good." He hears Ingrid exhale with relief. "You both told me how much you would like to visit the mountains, so I have a proposition for you. I'd like to invite you over to my house in two weeks for Christmas." Killian thinks about a Christmas in the snow with a gorgeous scenery and the smile on his face extends. "You don't have to feel obligated to accept. I just thought it was a fun idea." Ingrid adds when the conversation stays silent.

"It is. It really is. The only problem is that we celebrate Christmas with our friends every year and it'd be a pity to cancel that last minute."

"They can come with, no problem!"

"Are you sure?" Killian asks.

"Of course. The more, the merrier. About how many people are we talking here?" Killian does a quick mental count.

"You have me and Emma and Mary Margaret, David and their son Theo and Graham. So six." He suddenly remembers something. "Wait, never mind. We are seven." He can't forget the woman Graham is introducing.

"Your friends are very welcome to come with, Killian."

"I'll ask them tomorrow if that's okay with you."

"Of course it is. Just call me back to let me know. Bye."

He says goodbye to Ingrid and ends the call. Ingrid must've taken a particular liking to them for her to invite 7 people over for Christmas. He can't wait to hear what his friends think of this and most importantly Emma.

Their weekly dinners started after graduation. They were used to spending so much time together at university that, when everyone was busy working or searching for work, they missed each other. It started out in the small apartment Mary Margaret and David were living in and when they weren't all bankrupt anymore, it was moved to a restaurant. Graham joined later when Emma started her job as deputy because she thought he'd fit in with the group quite well. Killian was jealous at first. He heard Emma was bringing someone and instantly assumed it was a boyfriend. Seeing the man only enhanced that jealousy. Until it became clear that their bond was strictly platonic. The group remained the same for 4 years. It was a thing reserved for the five of them and new people had to be accepted by the entire group. Killian gets why Graham was so nervous before. Introducing someone you care for while there's chance that your friends reject that person holds a great risk. Killian never even considered bringing any of the girls he had a short dalliance with, it wasn't adequate. Even Emma never took Walsh with her. Killian still wonders why not.

For the first time in three weeks everyone is present Saturday. Emma looks as usual, beautiful and amazing, but there's no sign of sickness. She must've made a quick recovery.

"My dear friends." Killian claims the attention and everyone listens to what he has to say. "Not long ago Emma and I…" Emma glances at him when he mentions her name. She looks perturbed with not knowing where he is going. "…made the acquaintance of a lovely woman named Ingrid." Emma's face becomes even more confused. "Ingrid owns a house in the Maine mountains and would like to invite us all to join her celebration of Christmas." Everyone sitting at the table has astonishment etched on their faces, except for Emma.

"Killian, that's amazing!" Mary Margaret declares. "And we can all go?"

Killian nods.

"All seven of us." He is met by three curious gazes but Graham instantly catches on. His expression becomes even more happy.

"Don't you mean six?" David asks.

Killian shakes his head and gestures towards Graham.

"I'm taking someone with me."

Emma's face finally lights up.

"Are we actually meeting the girl you've been seeing for at least the last three months?"

"Yes, you are." So it has been more than three months that Graham and the lass have been together.

"It's about bloody time, right mate?" Killian clasps Graham on the shoulder. He has never seen the Irishman this shy before. It's quite endearing.

David turns to Emma.

"Tell us more about this Ingrid person. Who is she exactly?" They both tell the story of the dinner party they went to. Graham interrupts them with a "You went on a date?!" but Emma quickly corrects him. It was only a favor to help him and it was a one time thing.

"But she thinks you two are a couple. That means that you have to act like one the entire trip." he notices. Killian hasn't thought about that. Ingrid is convinced of their relationship and it would be plainly rude to accept her offer and say that they only pretended. Another option is to just cancel the holiday and cut all ties with Ingrid but that would be unmannerly as well. He now gets why Emma wasn't as excited as the rest of his friends. This meant they had to put up the little show again. Did she hate it that much? He had a good time and the difference between how they normally acted was minimal.

"We'll discuss that later." Emma says. "Let's celebrate Graham and his love life for now." Emma raises her glass and three hands follow her action. Graham waits a bit before lifting his. A loud clink sounds when they are all joined together.

Killian is paying his and Emma's share of the note. David and Mary Margaret have gone home to relieve the babysitter of her duties and Graham has gone to his lass' house to announce the news. It is the perfect moment to discuss it.

"What do you think of Ingrid's offer?" He starts the conversation.

"It's very kind of her. I was aching to go there when was she describing her surroundings, so yes, I like it." She is saying that, but there is no trace of enthusiasm in her voice.

"It's the pretending…" he remarks. She nods.

"Killian, I already had difficulties with lying to her face for one evening and now I'm supposed to do it during an entire week? She's too kind to deserve that." That's it. Emma doesn't like the lying. It has nothing to do with pretending to be his girlfriend, it's her just side.

"I know." He doesn't know what else to say so he shrugs. "Would you like to spend more time with her?" he asks at last.

"Sure, I really feel a connection with her. It would be a pity to lose that."

"Then we'll do it. For one more week. After that we can always say that we broke up. It'll be some time before we can see her again."

"Okay." The conversation ends with that and they go home. Both seperately.

* * *

Emma feels like an idiot. She shouldn't have said that about the connection. That was the deciding factor for Killian. She should have made clear that the lying wasn't her only problem. She should have said that she felt awkward, or that she didn't like Ingrid or that she was planning to go to a spa resort that week. Literally anything would've been better than having to pretend that they're a couple for another week. Killian would've understood. He wouldn't continue with something she isn't up for. She is so angry with herself. This is asking for more complications and problems. She sighs while watching surveillance footage on the computer.

"What's wrong?" Graham walks in with a square box in hand.

"If you're carrying what I think you are, nothing." He hands her the box and when she opens it, her life has become just that little bit easier. A bear claw.

"No, seriously. Is everything all right?"

The bear claw is already half stuffed in her mouth so he has to wait on reply, which he doesn't.

"Is it because of the whole "we're pretending to be in love thing"?" Graham moves some files and sits down on the corner of the desk. She still can't answer. Graham watches her and there's some concern to be found on his face. Emma nods. "I don't even understand why you agreed in the first place, Emma. This is not a light matter." The last bit of sugar disappears in her mouth.

"I wanted to help him. He asked me, desperately and it was only supposed to be a one time thing"

"That I get. Who cares that you were lying to the weird dog lady, but are you sure you want to do it for another week? It's clear that Ingrid is a very kind woman, inviting us like this and if you became friends, then it's very wrong to lie to her." He has a point. Of course he has but there just isn't another option.

"We can't come clean now, Graham. She already thinks that we're together and I think that it's not really that believable if we went from being in love to a break up in just two weeks. The best thing would be to not go on the trip and forget that Ingrid exists but we pretty much already agreed. She's all alone and wants to spend a holiday with people. I don't blame her. Not everyone has such a great entourage as we have."

Emma is an expert on spending the holidays alone. She spent most of her adolescent life alone. In families that didn't care about her. So she ran. As far and as fast as she possibly could. One day, when she was stealing packet of Twizzlers, a brunette noticed her.

"You want me to pay for that?" she asked. Emma was confused. Why was she talking to her and why was she even offering this to a stranger?

"No, it's all right." She went and returned the box. She would come back for it later. "Are you going to tell on me?"

"Of course not. I can see that you're hungry. You can pick something and I'll give it to you, as a present." Emma wasn't going to say no to an offer like that and she went and got cereals. "Is that what you're going to eat tonight?" She creased her forehead.

"Yes." Emma replied. Tonight and the following days too.

"That just won't do. You are coming with me for a nice dinner. I'm Mary Margaret by the way." The girl extended her hand and Emma shook it. The girl practically dragged her to her house. She ate at Mary Margaret's that night, stayed over when Mary Margaret convinced her father and never really left after that. They became great friends and the Blanchards officially adopted Emma as her 16th birthday present. She started working at school so she could get accepted in college, which she did, and their bond only became stronger over the years. In an instance Mary Margaret became the most important person in her life. And in many ways she still is. She owes Mary Margaret her entire life.

"So you're gonna go through with it?" Graham asks. Emma thinks for another second until she makes up her mind.

"Yes."

The two weeks are a lightning bolt. They flash by in an instance and before Emma can register that they happened, she is greeted by the thunder. Or in this case the sound of the plane's take off. She has never been a fan of airplanes. They are too unpredictable. This is also only the second time she has taken one, the first time being a trip to Disneyland with Mary Margaret. They had all agreed that it was easier to go by plane for Theo than to drive for more than a day. Killian is sitting next to her and David, Mary Margaret and the baby are sitting in the row behind them. Graham is coming on the next flight with his mystery woman.

"You alright, love?" She looks at him.

"Uhuh."

"Because you are holding that chair like you're trying to win a match of arm wrestling from it." Her hand is curled around the armrest and her veins can clearly be seen.

"I'm fine." She doesn't even try to let go of the blue seat. Killian opens a book and nods.

"Alright." He sits in a more comfortable way and starts reading. Emma wished she was that careless and not completely freaking out. She feels something warm envelop her knuckles and looks at the rest. Killian's hand is laying over hers, slowly prying her fingers loose. When she glances over to Killian to ask what he's doing, he is still concentrated on the page. Her palm leaves the seat. Still without looking, he joins their hands and intertwines their fingers. The cool metal of his rings brushes against her skin. She doesn't feel the urge to grasp anymore, just the pressure of his hand and its soft pulse is enough to make her calm down. They stay like this for a long time. His look focused on the letters and hers always drifting back to the link between them. She should ignore the way he can comfort her, the way that a simple touch can settle her thoughts and ease her mind. And she tries, she really does, but in the end it always goes back to him knowing her. Knowing her fears and doubts even when she so firmly tries to conceal them. Never does she succeed in doing that with Killian.

The urban decor slowly changes into a scene where trees play the main character. Streaks of green flash by the tinted windows. Ingrid had sent cars to pick everyone up from the airport. It is incredible how much that woman is providing for them. Emma doesn't really know what to expect when they arrive. How is she supposed to behave? Like she's in love with Killian in any case, but for the rest of the vacation? They had only met Ingrid once and even though they really clicked and they talked about a lot, she's still a stranger to them and definitely to her friends, who have never even seen the woman. She feels a pull and when she turns her head Theo is grabbing her hair with full force.

"Hey there little buddy. Can you let go of my hair?" Theo opens his mouth and reveals a single, white tooth. His grip is still as strong.

"Honey, leave auntie Emma alone." Mary Margaret says gently to the baby in the car seat. Ingrid had even thought of that. Theo is apparently done with using her locks as a toy and takes an actual toy to occupy himself with.

"Thank you, kid." She ruffles the hairs on his head that have the exact same color as hers do.

"Emma." By the tone Mary Margaret uses she can already tell what this will be about.

"Mary Margaret, please don't. I've had enough lectures for a life time now. I don't have the need to hear another one." Between Mary Margaret's first one, Graham's and even David who quickly shared his opinion, she has had enough of it.

"I know, Emma, but I just don't want you to get hurt." Mary Margaret looks at her with urging eyes. Why couldn't her friends just let it go already?

"I'm not, Mary Margaret. I don't even know why you expect that to happen." She and Emma are sitting in a separate car from David and Killian. They all agreed that some girl/bro (or mate in Killian's case) time was welcome and they quickly decided the seating arrangement.

"I saw you on the flight. Holding hands." A perfect eyebrow goes up.

"He was just trying to calm me down. I hate flying, remember?"

"I don't think I can ever forget that. I still have a scar on my hand by your doing." Emma's first flight didn't go as effortless as she would like it to have gone. She felt dizzy, nearly had to puke and was this far from crushing Mary Margaret's hand.

"Plus it's only Killian."

"But it's still a difficult situation to be in, Emma. With whom ever it might be. I've said it already and I'll say it again: be careful." The car takes a stop and the driver makes them aware of their arrival. Emma gets out and her breath is taken away by the view. When Ingrid said she lived in the middle of the mountains, she didn't think it was quite this literal in the middle. When she inhales, her lungs are filled with the purest air she could imagine. When her feet touch the ground a crispy sound can be heard. The sound of fresh snow.

"This is Theo's first snow." Mary Margaret says excited. She rearranges his grey and red scarf a bit tighter around his neck so he doesn't catch a cold. Normally December automatically meant snow on the Storybrooke streets, but this winter they all had given up their hopes for a white Christmas. The temperatures were those of a typical fall day and it wasn't looking like that was going to change. Another car pulls up. There are the men. Her earlier expression is mirrored on their faces. Killian walks towards her, dragging his suitcase with him.

"Swan, do you have any idea where we need to go, because the only thing I'm seeing are trees."

"And I thought you liked nature."

"I do. Although I am more prone to the sea than to the forest." He retributes her glare.

"Check your phone. Maybe Ingrid left you a message."

"There's no need for that." A composed voice echoes all of the sudden. Everyone turns their heads, slightly surprised, and when they do, Ingrid is standing behind them. The dress is gone, but she's still wearing white. "Welcome!" Her face is graced by a pleasant smile. She approaches the group and heads over to Emma and Killian. How is Emma supposed to greet her? It doesn't take long before her question is answered by the woman opening her arms before her. Emma copies the movement and they shortly embrace each other.

"It's good to see you, dears." Killian gets the same hello.

"You too." he replies. "May I introduce you to David" David steps forward and extends his hand. "Mary Margaret and their son Theo?" Mary Margaret joins her husband and shifts Theo to her left arm to be able to stretch her right. Again, Ingrid shakes it.

"I'm Ingrid. I am very pleased to be able to spend this joyful time with you. I suggest we go inside because it is a bit chilly for the baby." Not only for him Emma thinks. They all wait until Ingrid moves because none of them have any idea where that inside she speaks of might be. Not far from the place they were dropped off lies a white gate. Nearly impossible to see in the surrounding unless you are standing right in front of it. Once Emma sees it, she is impressed by its craftsmanship. The pure metal is connected by snowflakes made by such detail that, not considering the size, they nearly look real. On command the gate separates in two, leaving an open way for the group. The trace of her footsteps appears in the cold snow and they are on their way.

* * *

Killian recalls Ingrid's words. She said that her house was more humble than Cruella's but Killian doesn't see it. Size wise the cottage doesn't seem inferior to his boss's. Maybe Ingrid is more hesitant to flaunt her wealth. The woman leads them in the building. The cold has caused a rosy color on Emma's cheeks. She looks beautiful. Before he can reprobate himself for being captured again by her fairness, he remembers that they are together, at least according to their host. He always has to be so careful admiring her. There's always the risk of her catching him or the knowing looks of their friends finding his, but now, for the first time in six years, because of their ruse, he doesn't have to hide his infatuation with Emma Swan. They set foot in the wooden house and his cold hands immediately find their heat again. Killian doesn't understand how it's possible but the inside is even bigger than his perception of the front. The house is decorated with such refinement. Minimalistic and certainly not too tacky. It has that sophisticated glow that Cruella's totally lacked. Large windows provide the entire room of lighting, which is quite a task seeing the space it occupies. Kitchen, living and dining room are combined into one. A light grey sofa is placed in front of the large fireplace. On the white carpet stands a wooden table. The walls are graced by ancient looking tapestries and small lights hung around the room. Ingrid managed to combine modern and vintage. Of course the pine tree is an obligation with this holiday and it's proudly standing in the center of the room. He looks over to Emma, who is taking in the entire scenery. Her face is a child on Christmas morning, watching the presents the night has brought.

"This is…" She lightly shakes her head out of disbelief. "I mean this is amazing, Ingrid." she says.

"I agree with what Emma says." Killian adds.

"Me too." Mary Margaret says while nodding. It's clear that Ingrid feels moved.

"Thank you. I feel honored to have you here." She smiles.

"The honor is completely ours." David insists. Ingrid deserves an incredible amount of gratitude for her kindness.

"Alright. Let's not waste time thanking each other." She has a kind look on her face. "I'll show you to your rooms. You are probably all tired and could use some rest before dinner." There are two big stairwells that go upstairs and Ingrid ascends the left one. The group follows, luggage in hands. The upper story has the same kind of design and looks just as impressive. The wooden doors are engraved with Nordic patterns.

"So, Mary Margaret and David." Theo makes a noise. "And the little snowflake of course." Ingrid says to the wee lad. "This is your room. I provided a crib for Theo and a place where you can comfortably change him." Ingrid's hands opens the door and the family walks in. "But I guess I'll let you discover it for yourself. Dinner is served at six. Don't be late!" Emma and he are the only one remaining. Graham is set to arrive somewhere just before dinner. Emma walks towards the door across the hall, assuming it's hers. "Oh no. I have a special room for you two." For them. Because they are a couple. This is quite an important detail that Killian completely obliterated on. The panic is easily read off of Emma's face. They have no other choice than to follow Ingrid. The last door on the right is where she stops.

"I chose this one for you because I think you might enjoy the view." With that statement Ingrid leaves them standing in front of the closed door. Killian finally opens it and lets Emma go inside first. He understands why Ingrid gave them this room. Just like in the living room, this one also has an entire wall made out of glass. The snowy tops of the pine trees are what they look out to. For a second he is mesmerized by the view. A lake is lying on the edge of the forest. The wind causes a slight tremor on the surface. Ingrid is completely right.

"Let's address the elephant in the room." Emma interrupts his gazing. "We have to share a room. How are we going to sort this out?" Killian turns back to her.

"I have no idea. We clearly can't say we want a separate room because that would expose us." He lets his eyes scan the space. A sofa, a smaller version of the one downstairs, is turned to the balcony. "I can sleep in the sofa. You take the bed. As for the privacy, we just have to schedule everything and I think we can survive this week." And so they do. Emma gets to shower in the morning. She won't be bothered by Killian, who always gets up early and who will be downstairs at that moment. The evenings, right after dinner Killian takes his shower while Emma is downstairs. They have it all planned out.

"I think I'm going to take a quick nap." Emma says while yawning. "I really didn't sleep last night." Killian understands the silent hint.

"Of course. I think I'll take a look at the surroundings. See you at dinner then?" Emma nods while trying to suppress another yawn.

"Yes, see you then." She crawls into the king sized bed and nearly disappears under the blue covers. Her breathing becomes steady and Killian silently leaves the room when she's fast asleep.

His feet reach the final step of the staircase and hit the wooden planks.

He hears a clatter of pans and smells delicious herbs. Ingrid is standing in the immense kitchen all by herself, stirring in three different casseroles at the same time.

"Can I offer some help?" He asks. Ingrid barely looks up from the stove but still smiles.

"Oh no. I have everything under control." She shortly turns her head and notices Emma's absence. "Emma didn't join you?"

"She was feeling somewhat tired after the journey so she went to lie down for a bit. I thought it was best to grant her some rest. I was wondering: that lake our room looks out to. Is it far by foot?" Ingrid turns off one of the stoves and moves a pot.

"About 30 minutes. And that's with a slow pace. You want to visit it?"

"Yes, it looks quite magnificent."

"It really is." A timer rings. "You better leave now if you want to be back in time."

"Aye, aye, boss!" Killian says and his right hand makes the military salute. It's a dumb joke but he leaves Ingrid with a smile on her face and his is lit by one as well.

* * *

Emma is woken by a voice calling her name.

"Emma. Emma. Come on wake up, lass." His tone is somewhere between a whisper and the normal volume of his voice.

"HmmmIwannasleep." she mutters in one breath. Killian chuckles.

"I know, love, but it's time for dinner." His hand finds itself on her cheek. She gasps.

"Killian!" The hand is cold. Actually, cold is an understatement, the palm is icy. He did say he was going on a walk so he probably just returned and instantly came upstairs. It doesn't take long for her warmth to transfer on his skin and he moves some of her locks away from her eyes. Her hand covers his and rubs.

"Graham has arrived and everyone is waiting downstairs." That catapults Emma back into reality. She is lying in bed, Killian came to wake her up and she is now taking his hand captive by her touch. She immediately releases. It is so easy to have casual contact with him. To be in a situation but still feel like it's normal that he wakes her up in such a tender way. That she wants to stay and even might consider to ask him to join her. This is one of the reasons she always tries to avoid touching Killian. When she meets the others, they always receive a hug, but with Killian she always tries to keep it to a simple hello. When the entire group is present, she just goes for the quick wave and that's enough.

There's no trace of sleep in her voice anymore.

"I'm coming. I'll just go and freshen up and I'll be right downstairs."

"Alright. See you in a bit."

The water she splashes on her face helps to regain her senses. She is here to have fun and to enjoy her vacation and she, most importantly, can't think of Killian. Which is going to be hard. They do share a room and need to pretend they're in a lovey-dovey relationship. She wants to scold herself. She was fully aware of her feelings for Killian and she still agreed to do this for an entire week. She runs her brush through her hair and puts it back on the marble sink. Emma decides to put on some makeup. Her lips get a light color of lipstick on them and her eyelashes a thin layer of mascara. She should hurry if everyone is waiting on her. She runs downstairs and nearly trips over the carpet but is capable to save her dignity just in time.

"Emma! You're awake." Mary Margaret is standing near the steps and walks with her to the table.

"Yeah, sorry. I was really tired."

"No problem, sweetie. It's important to rest." Emma spots Graham's curls and walks over to ruffle them.

"Hey Wolf." She greets him. There's a small blonde sitting next to him. Graham groans out of discontent. It makes Emma smile.

"Wolf? I feel a story coming up." David comments.

"A story we are not going to tell!" Graham's voice sounds urging.

The Wolf nickname found its origin about two years ago. One night when Emma had the evening shift Graham had come to the station claiming that he had seen a wolf. Emma was convinced that it was impossible. Storybrooke's wildlife was limited to a few squirrels, Pongo and Ursula's pet squid Seawitch. Graham didn't want to listen and decided to go on a search. It's so irresponsible to let someone drunk run through the forest at night so Emma followed. Graham kept saying that he knew that there was a wolf in town, that he sensed it. After running around for a while Emma heard howling and she was scared to death. Until she realized that the source of the noise her boss, sheriff Graham, was. She, to this day, still doesn't know what he drank that night because Emma has no notion of any drink that could cause that. To tease him she started to call him Wolf because he was a wolf in sheep's clothing. Swan and Wolf, here to protect the town. Graham feels so embarrassed every time she mentions it. Emma understands it's not a story to tell while introducing your girlfriend for the first time.

"I won't." She turns towards the blonde. "Hi, I'm Emma."

"Christina. But you can call me Tina."

"It's great to finally meet the woman that has captured our sweet friend's heart."

Tina laughs.

"And it's also great to finally meet the friends that my sweet boyfriend talks about almost all of the time." Graham hides in his hands.

"You are already making me regret this!" he exclaims.

"Oh no, but we're all so fond of you, sheriff." Ingrid chips in. The entire room fills with laughter. They all take a seat and start the delicious meal Ingrid has prepared. Theo is sitting in between David and Mary Margaret and next to them is Ingrid. Emma occupies the seat opposite of her and next to her her pretended lover Killian. The table is completed by Tina and Graham.

They tell stories of their first meetings and first impressions of each other.

"Look, it was a beloved sweater of mine, okay?"

They talk about foreign places. If you combine the entire company sitting at the table, they have seen a lot of the world. Graham and Killian are both from Europe so they both went to London, where Killian was born, Paris, Berlin. The most famous places that Emma has always wanted to visit. You have Ingrid who did an entire tour of the Northern countries starting in Finland and making her way to Greenland. Mary Margaret and David went to South-America for their honeymoon. They spent most of their time volunteering for the people in need. Tina was born in New-Zealand and went to Australia and finally ended up in the US. They all saw the world. Everyone except Emma. Disneyland was the furthest she went. She listens to the stories with great fascination.

"I think we better put Theo to sleep." Emma looks at the kid and sees signs of exhaustion that both of his parents also show. Mary Margaret agrees with David.

"Yes, I think it's time to go to bed. For all of us because I could also use a good night's sleep." She turns to Ingrid.

"Thank you for a lovely dinner. To repay the favor, I will take the responsibility of tomorrow's meal."

"That's not necessary." Ingrid tries to decline but Mary Margaret is persistent, always has been.

"You have done more than enough. You don't have to worry about dinner, I'll take care of it." Ingrid places her hand on Mary Margaret's as a sign of thankfulness. David walks over to Emma and hugs her.

"See you tomorrow." Graham and Killian get a profound handshake and Tina also gets her first hug of the bunch, many more to come surely. Emma takes a step towards Theo to wish her godchild a goodnight but the little fellow has fallen asleep in his mother's arms. A caress on the crane will have to do and she gives a half hug to Mary Margaret, to make sure the baby doesn't wake. Apparently Graham and his girlfriend have also decided to go to their rooms because Tina is hugging Emma and telling her how great it was to meet her.

"The feeling's mutual. I can't wait to get to know you better but thankfully we have the entire week for that." They share a smile and off the couple goes. The only people left in the room are Ingrid, Killian and herself. Ingrid starts clearing the table.

"Wait, we'll help with that." She takes a plate and piles it on another. Killian does the same.

"It was an incredible evening, wasn't it?" Ingrid asks. Emma nods.

"It was great, Ingrid. This is already successful and we're only at day one." A lot of their group dinners are amazing. There is always a good mood and the conversations are omnipresent, this night was no exception. Ingrid looks happy with the fact that everyone enjoyed their evening as much as she did. It must be quite lonely to live here, alone all the time. Emma understands that an evening, like the one they just had, can leave an impression on someone who is used to not having a lot of people around her. Emma is carrying the cutlery while Killian is carrying the pile of plates to the kitchen sink.

"Ingrid, do you have a dishwasher?" Killian asks, his hands softly placing the ceramic in the sink that is made out of the same material as theirs upstairs.

"No, it's a bit of a waste buying one when you are alone. But you don't need to do the dishes, I'll do them tomorrow morning." There is quite an amount of dishes that need to be done so Emma still asks.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, dears." Ingrid reassures them. "It's a beautiful evening, it would be a pity to lose it on dirty plates." Is that a hint for her and Killian? What should she do? Killian takes control.

"All right. You don't suppose you want to take advantage of the beautiful evening, love?" He turns to Emma and stretches his hand out for her to take it. She lays her hand in his and he intertwines them. In her head the same sentence keeps on repeating itself: "It's all part of the act, Emma. All part of the act." They walk towards the big glass doors and Killian uses his free hand to slide one open. It's cold outside but Emma doesn't mind. Her temperature is already higher than normal, so it'll take a while before it bothers her.

"Bloody hell! It's cold." Emma laughs.

"I thought you were used to bad weather." She teases him, just like normal. In contrary of the situation.

"Swan, I'm from London, not bloody Antarctica. We mostly have rain." He releases her hand to rub his together. Emma sits down on the bench.

"I'm glad that Graham introduced Tina. I really like her." She crosses her legs below her.

"Aye" Killian joins her. "She is really great. You'll see that once you get to know her."

"Because you already do after those twenty minutes without me." She raises her eyebrows.

"More like an hour, Swan. But I do indeed already know her." Confusion appears on Emma's face. "Remember those three months I went to work to guide orphans?" Emma nods. She had missed him incredibly back then."Tina was also a volunteer there. We shortly bonded but lost contact and now she's here."

"It's a small world, apparently."

Killian chuckles.

"You could say that." Emma looks around. There's not much to see in the dark winter night but when she looks up the stars are shining with all of their brightness.

"The stars look amazing."

Killian's eyes go up to the sky.

"If there's a day I'm not amazed by the stars, you should be worried." Emma glances over to him and she sees a smile and the disbelief on his face by the beauty of the stars. She wishes for a time where she is on the receiving end of that look.

"Do you think Ingrid is buying it?" He shifts his gaze. "You know, this." Her hands gesture between them. Killian shrugs.

"We are not acting very different than we act as friends, are we? I don't know if it's enough." What else can they do? They can constantly walk hand in hand and spend more of their time together but if that's the thing that makes it believable, Emma doesn't know. They have to kiss. That's the main thing people in love do.

"We need to kiss." she states.

"Emma… Are you sure? That's maybe crossing the line, no?" It has started snowing. Little white flakes are falling out of the dark sky. Killian's black hair is decorated by the ice crystals.

"It's part of the show, Killian. It's only an act. We are grown enough to go back to being friends after this, right?"

He replies hesitantly.

"Aye."

"Okay, then we need to kiss." Some of the white, icy drops fall out when Killian's hand goes behind his ear to scratch. In the corner of her eye, Emma sees Ingrid reading a book. She stands up and Emma knows that this is the right time. Their friends have all gone to bed so they don't have to know about it. "Now's the time." Killian is shocked.

"Now? But Emma-" He can't say anything else because Emma's lips are already on his. Snowflakes are falling on their cheeks and noses and it's still very cold outside. His hands come up and cup both of her cheeks. They come closer to each other. His lips feel soft, softer than she could've imagined. She doesn't want to admit it but Emma has thought about this moment uncountable times. Both of their eyes are closed and in that moment she lets go. Her breathing accelerates and the kiss becomes more passionate. Emma's eyes suddenly open. She's not supposed to enjoy this. It's going to far. This is not real. They were only kissing to make a story more believable, not because they were actually in love. She breaks the kiss up and for the next second their foreheads rest on one and another. Emma looks back at the window and the room has become dark. Ingrid left. There's still one light on, probably for them to find their way. Emma moves away from the bench and stands up.

"I think I'm going to bed. Can you wait here for 10 minutes so I can get ready?" Emma doesn't really wait on his answers but when she walks inside, she still hears it.

"As you wish."

 **Extra A/N: I just want to quickly mention that when Emma says that kissing is the only way to show love, she is completely and utterly wrong. The thing is just that they are so convinced that they need to pretend they love each other when they don't even have to prove to Ingrid that they are in love because she already saw it in the way they look at and talk about each other. Actually everyone knows (Graham, David, MM) except for the two idiots in question, hence the title of the fic ;) Reviews are much appreciated**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: It's only been four days since the last one but here, have a new chapter :) Part three of my CSSS gift. It's very christmassy, so just ignore the fact that Christmas is long over ;) There's a new character in here that I adore. I hope you like it and if you do, I love reviews ;)**

The room is dark when he enters. The freshly fallen snow outside gives a glow to the space through the windows. It looks like Emma is already sleeping, so Killian tries to make as less sound as possible walking towards the bathroom. The switch turns on the light and he walks towards the mirror. He removes the last remnants of snow and dries his hair with a towel. There is lipstick on his lower lip. Only a pink smudge. He wipes it off. It's proof. Proof that he actually kissed Emma and that it wasn't just his imagination gone wild. He hankers for some trace of happiness but there's none to be found. They kissed for all the wrong reasons and it has made Killian feel guilty. He dragged Emma into this and she's even willing to go that far for him. To help him. It's so unfair to pretend a relationship with Emma when he's actually in love with her and yet, that's exactly what he's doing. It's too unrightful towards Emma. She doesn't know about his feelings and Killian knows that she won't like it when she hears that he agreed, knowing what they had to do. He shouldn't tell her. He had laid out his pajama in advance to be able to rapidly undress and put it on. He switches the light back off and walks on his tiptoes to his bed for the week, the couch. The couch is comfortable, if you don't account its 5'6" measurements. There's no way he can ever sleep pleasantly here, but he has no other choice. He grabs the folded quilt off the cushion and opens it. The sofa gets a thorough scan to decide what would be the best sleeping position. He eventually sits down and gives up his search. He will have to make the best of it.

It's early when Killian awakes. Awakes is not the right word. He had been tossing and turning the entire night to find a somewhat satisfying position and in the end he settled on the ground. He barely slept. It's still dark out. He uses his phone to illuminate the way to the bathroom. He traces the light circles under his eyes with his index. They won't disappear but he still tries to get rid of them with some cold water. He dresses and leaves the room, still quiet to let Emma sleep.

"Good morning!" Ingrid says joyfully when he gets downstairs. Killian clears his throat.  
"Good morning." he says a bit less enthusiastic than the woman standing before him. She walks to the cupboard, opens it and takes out a mug.  
"Coffee?" The magical word.  
"Yes, please" He needs something to survive this day, besides sleep.  
"Someone had a busy night." Killian doesn't understand Ingrid's insinuation and he looks confused.  
"You and Emma... You were looking cozy last night, so I thought it was best to leave you two alone." The confusion clears out of his head and he catches on. Oh boy. This is quite the embarrassing situation.  
"Um." is the only thing that comes out of Killian's mouth. How is he supposed to react on this without alluding to anything else. He scratches behind his ear.  
"I was just joking, Killian." She hands him a warm cup of coffee. He drinks, too fast because it burns his tongue, but he doesn't mind it. If it helps to tackle the weird circumstances. It certainly isn't a joke he'd expect of their hostess and he doubts that it was meant as such. She, more or less, implied that the reason why he's looking like an undead person is because he and Emma had long and passionate sex together. It definitely seems a more enjoyable activity than sleeping on a tiny sofa. It can only be good that Ingrid thinks that. It means that she is persuaded and that Emma and Killian have succeeded.  
Before Killian can process Ingrid's last statement, she adds another one to the list of "things I should forget were said, but I never will." in Killian's head.

"So. Have you thought about proposing to her?" It takes a great effort to prevent himself from spitting out the coffee in his mouth. "Because I think Emma would be ecstatic if you did and I can only imagine the beauty of that happening." It seems incredibly inappropriate to Killian but, as far as Ingrid knows, they have been in a happy relationship for nearly four years. Marriage is the next logical step. Emma Swan as his wife, that's something he cannot be averse to. He envisions Emma's slim hand with the blue stone around it. Their grandmother's ring was passed on to Liam and Killian had received their mother's. Secretly Killian is far more pleased with the sapphire he now possesses than he would be with the other one. It's a reminder of an astonishing woman and he made a promise only to give it to a woman who is at least as astonishing.

"Morning everyone." Killian is relieved by the new voice in the room.  
"Good morning, lass." he says to Tina. There's a buzz. The doorbell.  
"Oh, that's probably the groceries." Ingrid disappears behind the corner.  
"Do you want coffee?" Killian asks Tina. She nods and he goes to the cupboard where Ingrid took his mug.  
"Emma still sleeping?"  
"Aye." Killian suddenly thinks of something. Did Graham inform Tina of their little act? Or does she actually think they form a couple?  
"Tina... do you-" he says hesitantly.  
"I know, Killian. Graham told me."  
"Oh great. I feared for a second that you didn't." She takes the beverage.  
"You're an idiot."  
"Pardon?" He must've misunderstood her.  
"Killian." Tina looks at him. He suddenly feels guilty that he doesn't understand.  
"What?"  
"You're pretending to be a couple with Emma." She emphasizes her name and Killian steps closer to her.  
"Shhh. Ingrid can't know." Ingrid hasn't returned from the delivery, but she could any second. Tina turns her head towards the door and her blond hair moves along.  
"Take your coat. Nobody's up yet. We're taking a walk." she orders. Killian has no choice but to follow her instructions.

He wonders. Why Tina is so concerned about the fact that Emma's his ally in this? They're about five minutes away from the house. It's still visible and Killian is sure that they are as well. It is hard to miss two figures standing in a complete white background with the sunrise behind them. He decides that they're far enough and starts talking.  
"Tina, why are you so upset with me? You don't even know Emma."  
"No, I don't. But what I do know is that the reason you came to volunteer in Neverland wasn't because you wanted to help the children." Killian feels attacked. Who is she to claim that? He came to aid those in need. Before he can interfere, Tina nuances her statement a bit.  
"Okay, that was a big reason but that doesn't explain why you came all the way to Maryland. Maine has some great programs too. You wanted to get away. And I'll bet you 50 dollars that the reason was Emma." Tina is correct. He has never wanted to admit it, not even to himself, but it is irrefutable. The reason was Emma. The story he told to Ingrid that time was true. When he saw Emma with Walsh, he suddenly discovered all of these feelings he had for her. It was like a light had turned on in a previous dark room. When the room was uncovered, he had seen everything and he couldn't forget the things he saw. The worst part was that she was happy with Walsh. Her face was constantly lit up by smiles. She was more absent, spending nearly all of her time with him. It wrecked Killian. So he started searching for a way to escape it, only for a while. He found Neverland and it seemed like the perfect getaway. A place for lost boys and girls. He would fit right in. He left for three months and when he returned, it didn't take long for Emma's relationship to be abolished. He returned right in time to pick up the pieces and mend the mess that Emma Swan, his Swan, had become.

"I know the way you look at her. It's the way I look at Graham and he looks at me." He sighs and fog follows out of his mouth. "Have you ever tried to tell her? Killian, it's been four years, four, since Neverland. That's long." He shakes his head. "Why not?"  
"I just can't." He shrugs. "And I unquestionably can't do it now. She'll hate me."  
"You don't know that." Tina tries to offer him some sympathy.  
"How could she not, Tina? I pushed her to do this. If she finds out that I've been in love with her this entire time... I don't even want to think about what would happen then." He would lose Emma for sure. And he's definite he won't survive that. She is too much to him.  
"So you're just going to keep pretending and then what?" Tina asks.  
"Then go back to the way it used to be."

* * *

Emma walks down the stairs and is greeted by a delicious breakfast. Graham, David, Mary Margaret and Theo are all eating. Killian isn't here. Weird, he wasn't in their room either.  
"Morning." She takes a seat. "Where's Killian?" Graham motions towards the glass. She looks and sees Killian and Tina talking. They are standing quite far but his blue coat and her green one make them much more visible in the morning light. What could they be talking about? "Killian told me that they used to know each other." Graham sets his juice down.  
"Yes, they both worked in an orphanage called Neverland. Tina often talks about it but she never realized that my friend Killian was the same Killian that she met there until she saw him. I guess they have a lot of catching up to do." Emma glances a last time and grabs a piece of toast.  
"I guess."

The door slides opens and with it comes the cold.  
"Close it!" Emma shouts. The tank top and the thin sweater she's wearing over it are not appropriate for cold temperatures.  
"No worries, Swan. I'm already closing it. See?" To annoy her, he does it excruciatingly slow. She narrows her eyes and he grins.  
"Alright alright, I'll close the door." In one swift motion the door is finally closed.  
"Thank you."  
"You're welcome, love." He and Tina start talking again while removing their coats and gloves and walking towards the coatrack. They reach the table and Killian kisses her on the cheek. He whispers.  
"Morning, love."  
"Morning." Emma notices the looks that her friends give to each other. It's the first time that they witness any form of their PDFA. Public Display of False Affection. Tina joins Graham at the other side of the table.  
"Good, everyone's here." All eight people are present. "As you know tomorrow is Christmas Eve and I thought it might be nice to put some presents underneath the Christmas tree. I already have some but far too little. I would propose a small trip to town to do some Christmas shopping." Ingrid says. Almost everyone has some kind of food stuffed in their mouth so they just nod or put their thumbs up.  
"I'll arrange for some cars to take us all there."  
"How was your walk with Tina?" Emma asks Killian. She's more curious why they had a walk than she is about how it was.  
"Good." He takes another sip of coffee.  
"Great." she replies. He obviously isn't going to let her know more.

"The cars are here." Ingrid announces and they all stand up. That was fast. Does Ingrid have them on speed dial? Emma quickly runs upstairs for a more winter proof outfit and locks the door behind her, seeing that she's the last one to leave the house. Mary Margaret and the baby share a car with Ingrid because they want to discuss the plans for tonight's dinner. That gives Emma the choice between two cars. Tina and Graham decided to split up, so Emma has to choose between Graham & David or Tina & Killian's. She picks the latter. The two spaces in the back are already claimed by Killian and Tina and Emma would rather not sit pressed in between them. She gets in the seat next to the driver. The man has a big smile on his face and welcomes her.  
"Hi everyone! I'm Olaf and I'm your driver for today."  
"Nice to meet you." He has blond hair with streaks of white between them. Emma hears hushed sounds behind her and when she looks back Tina and Killian are talking. Their silent voices show Emma isn't welcome to join the conversation, so she just looks ahead at the road.  
"It really is beautiful, isn't it?" Olaf finally says. Emma wants to answer with yes but he continues before she can. "But it's so white. Y'know, how about a little color? I'm thinking maybe some crimson, chartreuse. How about yellow? No, not yellow. Yellow and snow?" Olaf chuckles to himself. Emma doesn't know how to reply to any of the things he's saying. He's a strange little man. At least he's having fun. "A no go, am I right?"  
"I guess?" But Olaf's face is so funny that Emma has no other choice than to burst into laughter. The situation is just too absurd. The buzzing of the chit chat behind halts and Killian's face peeps between the two front seats.  
"What's so funny?" he asks and Emma responds.  
"Nothing."  
They keep driving and Emma starts a conversation with Olaf. It turns out that he originally was hired by Ingrid's niece Elsa but when she moved back to Europe with her sister to claim some sort of heritage, Ingrid stayed behind and Olaf did too. Emma is amazed of how happy the man is. The joy catches on.

"We're here. Have fun and when you're done, call this number and I'll come pick you up."  
"You're sure you don't want to join us, Olaf?" Emma asks right after getting out. She stores the card in her back pocket. The quirky man shakes his head.  
"I'll wait until you are all finished."  
"Okay." She closes the door and waves. The town they're standing in is comparable with Storybrooke. Small and cozy. If there's anything to be found, it'll be in the Main Street. Emma ventures into the town, alone. She doesn't need anyone tagging along. Killian is still talking to Graham's girlfriend. He doesn't even notice. Emma tries not to be bitter. They're only talking and like she just said: Tina is Graham's girlfriend. Killian is aware of that. It bothers Emma that Tina knows so much of a period of which she knows nothing. Killian practically disappeared, only with the message he was going to volunteer in Maryland. During the three months Emma heard or saw nothing of him except from a card halfway through his absence. "I am well and enjoying the work with the children" That was all. She can't even explain how much that stung. A postcard. With one sentence written on it. It looks like Killian found an alternative for her in Tina in the course of those months. Emma doesn't like that she was so easily replaced.

She walks past a window and stops. In the showroom she spots something that definitely will please Mary Margaret. It's a bird cage. Since they were young Mary Margaret has always wanted a pet bird but never did she actually get one. Maybe this can convince her. The cage looks beautiful, vintage even. There are some cracks but nothing a lick of paint can't fix. She goes into the store to buy her first gift.

After a few hours Emma is content with the things she could gather. Mary Margaret has the bird cage, Theo a collection of cute little baby books, for Graham she specially picked a sweater with a wolf on it. Tina was more difficult because of the short time they've known each other but Emma thinks she still succeeded. She has no idea where the rest is and how far along they're with their shopping but she sets all of her bags down and takes Olaf's card. It can't hurt to call him already. If it takes too long before anyone else comes, she'll just chat with Olaf a little more.  
"Emma!" he exclaims over the phone.  
"Hi, Olaf. I'm done. It would be great if you could come by."  
"Of course. I'll be there in a snap. Until then."  
"See you soon." Emma hangs up and goes sit on a bench. Tina and Graham walk towards her. That meant that Killian and Tina went their own way.  
"Hey, Emma."  
"Hi guys. All done with shopping?"  
Tina raises the bags and nods.  
"I think so." She smiles.  
"I just called one of the drivers, so, if you want, we three can already return." Graham and Tina look at each other and see no objection. It doesn't take long before Olaf's car is there. Emma voluntarily sits on the front seat. She wants to talk some more with Olaf.

It's the middle of the afternoon and everyone has returned from town. The Christmas tree is surrounded by newly wrapped presents. Emma's very curious to see what everyone got one and another. Theo, who has just woken up from his nap, is alive as always and Emma decides to play with him. She takes a seat on the carpet.

* * *

When Killian walks in the room, Emma is vividly playing with Theo. She's making faces and turning her voice into funny variants. It makes Theo smile and even Killian's lips curl. She's a marvel. He goes to stand with Ingrid and Mary Margaret who are also partially viewing Emma and the baby and also consulting a cooking book.  
"Where's David?" he asks.  
"He went out with Graham and Tina. They are searching for wood." Killian is disappointed he missed them. He would love to go out and chop some wood.  
"Aha, alright. What are you doing?"  
"We're deciding what to make tonight." Ingrid turns a page.  
"Have you made any progress? Killian asks.  
"Maybe." Mary Margaret answers.  
"Ingrid, I was wondering if I could ask you something." Ingrid looks up at him.  
"Go right ahead."  
"I hope I'm not being immodest but where does your money come from?" It is totally besides the point and has nothing to do with the subject but Killian has been pondering over this for some time. Was it family money or did she marry rich? Ingrid closes the book.  
"Let's sit down." It seems that what they are going to hear now is very important. Emma stays on the carpet next to Theo, but turns towards the sofa. Ingrid takes a seat first and after that, Mary Margaret and Killian find a place. "My full name is Ingrid Carlotta Ängsälvor." All of a sudden her American accent has vanished and a Scandinavian one takes its place. "My father was king of a kingdom called Arendelle. It's a small country in between Sweden and Norway. I was the eldest of three sisters. That made me the crown princess. But to be able to claim the throne, I had to get married. My father pushed me to find a man to become my husband but I didn't want to force love. I left for a year to travel the Northern countries but I never returned to Arendelle. You see, when I was traveling, the kingdom was attacked by the troops of the Southern Isles. My father was killed, so was my younger sister Helga. Gerda was the only one that survived but she was still in mortal danger. She fled, together with her husband and two little children to live with me here. My nieces have gone back to claim the throne. I stayed here and bought an frozen treat factory and it did very well so a lot of my wealth comes from ice cream." Three amazed faces are staring at the crown princess of Arendelle. It's a lot to process. She clearly had suffered heartbreak.  
"You are royalty?" Mary Margaret utters. Killian doesn't know how to act. He's never been in the presence of a highness.  
"Don't pay attention to that. It's not important."  
"Ingrid, you can't pretend that it's only a piece of trivia." he comments.  
"I'm serious. I don't want you to treat me any different than you were before. If it was my niece Elsa, you would have to, she's a queen but it's only me."  
A sad expression comes over Ingrid's face. Killian understands why. It can never do good to be this far from your family. He has the same thing with his brother being overseas in London and him being here. He finds it hard to return because there are just too many bad recollections there. Ingrid must have the same feeling. Wounds made in the past tend to linger. There's a depressing gloom in the room.

"So." Emma says. "Ice cream. You don't have any here by any chance?"  
Ingrid laughs and with that the tension is gone.  
"I do. I have traditional flavors and some a bit more... special."  
Killian raises his eyebrow.  
"Such as?"  
"Carrot."  
"No!" Emma exclaims. Everyone looks at her and she focuses on Theo again. She tries to explain her little outburst. "You just can't-No. Carrot is a no go. It's ice cream! It should be- it definitely can't be vegetables." It seems Emma is offended by the mere thought that Ingrid has carrot ice cream in her freezer. He knows she is a sweet tooth. Always has been and probably always will be. He also knows that she has a tendency to neglect her vegetables in a meal.  
"Love, maybe you should give it a try before condemning it."  
"Good idea, Killian." Mary Margaret says. "If you try, I will too, alright Emma?" It's a bizarre situation. If it wasn't Emma they were talking to, it might seem like two parents trying to convince their child to eat his veggies. Emma scrunches her nose. He gives her an encouraging look.  
"Okay." she says reluctantly.

They are all surrounding a sitting Emma. A bowl of orange ice cream is standing before her.  
"Come on, Emma. Be a good girl." Killian says with a wink. The look he receives as a response is murderous.  
"Killian, you're wearing a white shirt, I have orange ice cream. Don't test me, because I might crave some payback for 6 years ago." He takes a cautionary step back. Emma looks satisfied. She takes the metal spoon and separates some of the scoop. After giving it a wary look, she opens her mouth. The ice cream disappears. 3 pairs of eyes are watching her. Searching for any indication.  
"So? What's the verdict?" Ingrid asks.  
"I have to admit it's not bad, but I do prefer rocky road."  
"Luckily for you, that's my specialty." She walks back to the freezer and brings back a white container. Emma's face lights up with the sight of the brown cream. Soon they all have their preferred flavor and Killian gets that Ingrid has earned so much money with her business. The ice cream is a delightful treat. When David, Tina and Graham return with an entire wheelbarrow full of chopped wood, they have to blink twice when they see the rest of the group eating ice cream in the middle of winter.

"I don't think I can eat anymore." David lays his hand on his stomach.  
"Me neither. It was exquisite, Mary Margaret." Killian says. Every last bit of food is devoured by the group sitting at the table.  
"You have to wait and see what Ingrid and I have planned for tomorrow." Whatever it might be, Killian knows it will be absolutely delicious. The two women clearly have a gift for cooking. He's excited for tomorrow. They probably won't go as far as caroling but they can still listen to some Sinatra Christmas songs and cozy up before the fireplace. Exchange the gifts they have bought one and another. Eat divine food. Christmas can't go wrong.

* * *

She hears him adjusting his position over and over again, just like last night. She was sure he was going to mention something about the couch being too small but he kept quiet. He didn't complain once, even if the lack of sleep was unmistakably represented on his face.  
"Killian." The rustling stops and he takes a breath. There is a complete silence. Even her breathing has become unnoticeable.  
"Killian." she says again. Emma knows he's not asleep. She feels it.  
"Sorry." He whispers.  
"For what?" He's already apologizing and he doesn't even know why she called him.  
"Waking you, I suppose."  
"You didn't."  
"Oh." The silence returns. "Why did you call me then?" he asks.  
"Come here." she whispers.  
"Wh-what?" Emma smiles to herself. She will never understand how he can go from dashing scoundrel to shy, sweet Killian in just moments.  
"You want to share the bed?"  
"No, I'm good here. Don't worry about me."  
"Killian... I know you barely slept last night. That couch is far too small for you. I have a huge bed for myself and you are sleeping over there. We can easily divide it with enough place for the both of us."  
"Swan, I'm all right."  
"Jones, I'm not taking no for an answer. Get yourself in here." Killian chuckles.  
"If you insist, Swan. But if you'd be so kind as to give me some light. I'm afraid my nocturnal sight is currently malfunctioning." Idiot. Her hand searches for the cable of the bedside lamp and clicks on the button. Her eyes had adjusted to the dark, so when the bulb goes on, they are overwhelmed by the brightness. She hears Killian's feet walk over the wood and feels the right side of the bed drop. She's still facing the left side and stays like that. She can't see him.  
"Thank you, Swan."  
"Don't mention it. Just stay above the first cover, will you?" She is okay with sleeping in the same bed, but not okay with sharing one blanket. She has seen enough movies to know what that results in.  
"Of course. You know I'm always a gentleman." She doesn't even have to see him to know that he's grinning.  
"Goodnight, Killian."  
"Sweet dreams, love." In a bed with him, that's the last thing she needs. The room is dark again.

Her brain decides that she needs to wake up and her eyelids follow its command. A ray of light falls on her pupil and it doesn't take long for both of the green eyes to open. She uses her thumb to rub in her eyes. She flexes her back and brings her other hand from behind her. Well, she tries. Something is holding her down and she has a feeling about what that something might be. She stares with big eyes at the wall. She's holding hands with Killian. Chances are that they have been holding hands for nearly the entire time they've been asleep. Her right hand grabs her phone to see the time. It's 9h12. For Emma that's the normal time she gets up, when she doesn't have to work of course, but Killian. He is always the "rise at the crack of dawn" guy. Even in the winter, when it's still pitch black outside the latest he gets up is 6:45. Why is he still sleeping? If he got up first Emma would've never known what they did and it wouldn't be important but now... She can't help but feel like this is the way she wants to wake up every morning. With Killian on her side. She softly separates their fingers and removes the two blankets off of her. Killian shifts. She quickly runs towards the bathroom. Killian doesn't need to see her unmatched pajamas. She randomly grabbed a shirt and a bottom from her drawer and she realized yesterday that that wasn't the best idea. She managed to take the two most hideous garments out of her closet, a zebra shirt and pink pants, and is now forced to combine them.

She is fully dressed and almost ready to leave. In spite of her alarming awakening, she managed to relax by taking a shower. There's a knock on the bathroom door.  
"Emma?"  
"Yeah?" she yells back while applying some mascara.  
"I'm sorry to bother you, love, but I really need to use the loo. Are you nearly done?"  
"Just give..." she goes over her eyelashes a final time with the black brush. "... me a second." She walks over to door and turns the knob.  
"Go ahead." His hair is messed up but still looks styled and the blue-ish edges are gone from beneath his eyes.  
"Thank you!" she hears before the door closes again. She puts her pajamas back in her suitcase. It's only day two and her clothes are already looking like a mess. Sometimes she wished for Killian's tidiness. His apartment is always organized and clean. In contrary to hers where clothes always have a way of piling up and dishes might occasionally be forgotten. There's a closet standing in the corner so she decides to store her clothes there. That way they are less likely to get wrinkled and a mess.  
"What are you doing?" His voice comes as a surprise.  
"I'm taking a page out of your book. I'm clearing things." She turns around and he's standing in a black sweater, hair damp from the short shower he apparently took.  
"I'm impressed." He smiles.  
"You should be. Now that you are ready, can we go eat?"  
"Lead the way." Emma closes her suitcase and walks towards the hallway.

"How did you sleep?" she asks.  
"Amazingly."  
"Told you you should sleep in the bed." She is positively boasting, her tone betrays that.  
"You did indeed. Thank you again, Swan." They descend the stairs.  
"Killian, it was the right thing to do. I wasn't going to let you sleep there while I was sleeping in a gigantic bed."  
"If I had known how soft it was, I would've claimed it myself." Killian says. It makes Emma laugh. They reach the table.  
"Wait, you two are up at the same time?" David says, his face puzzled by the two people standing before him.  
"Morning to you too, Dave."  
"Good morning, guys." David greets them in a proper way this time.  
"Better. Yes, we are. I had a great night's sleep and I had some catching up to do and plus: have you lain in the beds? They are heaven on earth."  
"I'll take that as a compliment." Ingrid says.  
"It definitely is." Emma goes sit in between Ingrid and Tina and they both welcome her with a smile. She pours coffee in the mug before her and wraps her hands around it for some warmth. David and Mary Margaret are having a conversation just by looking at each other. It's not unusual for them to be able to read each other's mind but there's something else. They seem to be very confused about something. Emma doesn't pay anymore attention to it. She's completely focused on the croissants laying before her. They look amazing. Golden brown and sweet. When she takes one, it makes a crispy sound.  
"I think I've been traded in by a pastry." Killian notices. Emma nods while eating the pastry.  
"Damn, beaten by the French, yet again." That line makes everyone laugh and Emma continues savoring the treat.  
"I propose that we start our festivities at 5pm. That gives you over 5 hours to do something else."  
"Ingrid, if you want us gone, you just have to tell us."

Her hand makes a gesture and accompanies her speaking.  
"Don't be silly." Killian's posture gives some air of "alright, if you say so" and Ingrid detects that. She quickly adds: "But yes, I wouldn't be opposed to an empty house to prepare." Killian grins.  
"Why don't we make a walk towards the lake? I've been there before and it's absolutely breathtaking."  
"Good, let's do that." Tina says while standing up. "Come on, babe. Get up. A walk in the forest, that's what you like." Graham turns his head abruptly towards Emma. His eyes become disappointed. Emma raises her hands.  
"I didn't tell her!" Graham clearly doesn't believe her. "I swear."  
"Graham..." Graham looks back at his girlfriend. "You told me how much you like the woods, remember?" Graham recalls the events because his eyes are sparked with memory. "But Emma, you really need to tell me that story." Tina walks over to Emma and links their arms.  
"Let's take a walk." Emma says enthusiastically and they walk outside.

Instead of telling the Wolf story, Emma talks about Graham and her first year working together. About the brave things he has done in their nearly 5 years of her being his deputy and how she had assisted him. It brings a smile on Tina's face to hear the amazing things her man has done. As a counter service, Tina tells things about Killian and the time in Neverland. About how the children instantly loved him and how he provided them with so much support. Emma is thankful because it's one of the first times since she's heard anything out of the three months without Killian. It really pained Tina to see the faces of the children after he left.  
"I'm sure he also felt it, but he had you to get back to." Emma becomes doubtful. Does Tina know? Before she can ask, Tina makes her doubt disappear.  
"Don't worry. Graham informed me." Relief washes over Emma. Why is Tina telling her this if she knows it's just for show? Especially the "he had you to get back to" part. In the fake story that might be true. They did say that it was right after their time apart that they became a couple but in reality nothing happened. She wants to continue asking but is interrupted by Graham.  
"I was wondering if I could steal my girlfriend from you."  
"Tell him no, Emma. I'm good here."  
"If you say no, I must insist that it's a matter of life and death." Emma watches the couple's display.  
"And what might that be?" Tina asks skeptically.  
"You see, it's been far too long since I've held my beloved one and I miss her, quite frankly." Emma smiles.  
"Tsss, you are an idiot, Graham Humbert." Tina says but Emma sees that she's trying to hold back her smile.  
"An idiot you love."  
"You have a point there." she admits. Tina turns back to Emma. "Do you mind?"  
"No, no. Go!" She gives Tina a light push towards Graham. He envelops her with his arms and kisses her. Emma decides to give them some privacy and looks behind her. Mary Margaret is walking with Theo in a baby carrier. She walks towards them.  
"Is he sleeping?" she says with a soft tone. Mary Margaret confirms with a nod.  
"Walk with me, will you?" They walk next to each other.  
"What happened?"  
"Huh?" Emma was in deep thoughts and it takes her some time to return.  
"Between you and Killian. Did something happen?" Emma frowns. Why would she think anything happen. What could've happened according to her friend?  
"What do you mean?"  
"Emma, you both got up at the same time. Killian's hair was wet and I could see that you took a shower as well. You both looked like you had the best night of your lives or something like that. Tell me." Emma is annoyed. How could she think this? It does explain the silent conversation David and Mary Margaret had earlier this morning.  
"Nothing happened, Mary Margaret. And honestly I don't really like that you just suppose we had sex or something. We're just friends. Nothing more. I don't know how many times I need to make that clear." Emma's being hard on her but she has to. If even her friends keep suggesting it, she might start thinking that it might be possible and that mustn't happen. Because it isn't.  
"I'm sorry, Emma."  
"Don't worry about it but just don't do it again, please. It makes everything much more difficult." They have stopped walking.  
"I understand. I apologize but you know me." Mary Margaret shrugs. Emma lifts one corner of her mouth.  
"I do."

They're all freezing when they return. Killian and Graham decided that Emma and Tina were in need of some snow on- well everything. Before they knew it, a true snowball war had begun. Boys versus girls. It was so unfair. Tina and Emma could beat Graham and Killian for sure but when David joined the boy's side, the battle was over. They all run upstairs to warm up and to change into their festive outfits. Emma plans on wearing a beautiful red dress. It's not too short but also just revealing enough. Killian walks out of the bathroom. His blue costume jacket matches his eyes. He didn't bother wearing the matching pants but replaced them with black ones. He's looking amazing.  
"You look great." she comments before going in the bathroom.  
"I'm sure you'll look at least as good and probably even better." She changes and puts on her heels. She chose the lower variant of those she wore at Cruella's dinner party. She doesn't want to experience that discomfort again. Some red lipstick on her lips and she is ready. Killian is sitting on the bed, waiting on her. When he sees her, his eyes widen.  
"Swan, you look- wow, just wow. I guess I was right" She smiles.  
"Thanks. Are you ready to go downstairs?"  
"Aye."

The lights in the room are dimmed and the Christmas tree is brightening the entire room. Somehow Ingrid has managed to continue decorating the room and changed clothes herself in the small time frame they were upstairs.  
"Merry Christmas Eve!"  
"Merry Christmas Eve!" They give a unison response. The room looks even more beautiful than before.  
"Ingrid, you've done a wonderful job, yet again." She is clearly pleased with Killian's compliment. Feet walk down the stairs and they turn around. David and Mary Margaret are carrying Theo. The baby is dressed in a cute little short with a bow tie.  
"Aw, look at him." Emma says and she walks over to the family. "Aren't you all dressed up." She opens her arms and David hands him to her. She moves her arms to support him the best way and walks over to the Christmas tree he has been staring at with complete fascination. "It's beautiful isn't it, kid." She takes his hand and let's it touch a branch. Theo giggles and the entire room follows with laughter. Graham and Tina join as well and the group is complete. Emma recognizes the first notes of "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas." and softly moves with Theo. She hums along.  
"Would you look at that, we're dancing." If Theo's happy noises are any indication, he's having fun and so is Emma.  
"Emma?"  
"Hmm?" She turns around and everyone is sitting.  
"We were discussing whether or not we would open the presents this evening or wait until tomorrow." David says. She looks over at Theo. He is too small to notice any difference between Santa bringing them in the morning or now. The impatience and curiosity are also overpowering any counterargument.  
"Why not before dinner? Theo won't know yet." His name is some kind of trigger for the boy because he starts grabbing her hair. His little fingers pull as hard as they can. She doesn't mind that much. The kid could probably get away with a lot, definitely later.  
"Alright, let's do that." Emma joins them. Tina is smiles.  
"We're Christmas together." She motions towards Emma's dress.  
"You look great. So does everyone by the way." When Emma looks around she notices that everyone, at least the women, stuck with their signature color. She's in red, Tina is wearing green, a favorite of hers as Emma has noticed. Mary Margaret's dress is a pastel blue one and Ingrid's is a white beige. They all look stunning but Ingrid could use some color. Color, that makes her think of something. She hands David the baby and takes her phone.  
"What are you doing?" Killian asks while she is unlocking it.  
"I quickly need to wish Olaf a merry Christmas."  
"Olaf? As in my driver Olaf?" Emma nods. She types a message fast and puts her phone back.  
"He was incredibly kind yesterday and really entertained me. He deserves some more joy." What was she thinking again? Color. Right, she should give Ingrid her present. "I'll start with the gifts." She walks to the tree and scans the wrappings. There's the one she is searching for. "This is for you, Ingrid. Thank you for all of what you're doing for us and Merry Christmas." Ingrid places her hand under her collarbone and uses her other one to take the gift. While she's unwrapping it, Emma goes sit next to Killian and he smiles at her. All of the wrapping has disappeared and now only the box remains.  
"I know that you are a lover of white but some color can't hurt." Ingrid reveals the blue pendant. If you look close enough there are little snowflakes on the bottom. Ingrid shakes it and the flakes float around.  
"Emma, it's amazing! Thank you!"  
"You're very welcome." Ingrid comes over to hug her.  
"It seems you set the tone right." Killian whispers in her ear.  
"Next!" They exchange gifts. Nearly all of them are a true success. Graham gives Emma the blender she so needed in her apartment. David gets a Queen record from Killian and Tina painted something for Mary Margaret. The moment where Mary Margaret gets Tina's gift, Emma knows that her present for Tina will be loved. There is a set of paint lying for her beneath the tree. Graham is mad when he opens Emma's gift and he sees the head of the wolf.  
"If you really don't like it, I'll return it." It is a pity, because, besides the hidden meaning, it is an amazing sweater.  
"I hate to admit it: I actually do like the sweater." Everyone starts cheering. Emma exclaims an internal yes. There is only one small present left under the tree and coincidentally Emma is the only one that hasn't received a gift from Killian.  
"Alright, love. I guess it's my turn." He grabs the box and hands it to her.  
"Here you go. Merry Christmas, Swan." She tries to unwrap it slowly but she has never been that kind of person. She takes the lid of the box and in it is a hair pin. Killian is watching her expression closely. A silver swan is lying in the black box. She afraid to even touch it, it looks that beautiful. She softly runs her finger over the long, elegant neck.  
"Aren't you going to take it out, Emma?"  
"Of course." She takes it out and lays in on her palm. She hears the wow of the women in the room and even Graham and David look impressed by the gift.  
"I walked past a antique shop and I thought it might be something you like." Killian says.  
"Like? I love it, Killian. It's incredible! Thank you."  
"Emma, if my partner gave me that, they would definitely receive more than just a regular thank you." There it is. Ingrid is one piece of work. Emma starts thinking. Will a kiss on the cheek do? A real one would be better but in front of all their friends? They are all grownups. They understand, or they should understand that it is for the show. She looks him in the eye to show her intentions. It's not needed for his face to change, she sees his eyes change with understanding. His cheek feels warm when Emma puts her hand on his face. Their lips touch and Emma tries make sure that he feels her gratitude. How long the kiss lasted, she doesn't know. It could've been the intended short peck , yet it feels like more. Something changed.  
"Thank you." She says again when they break apart. She runs her tongue over her lips.  
"It was my pleasure, love." he says in a hushed way. The room stays silent after that. Their friends are looking at them with astonished faces. Everyone but Tina and Ingrid.  
"Let's eat, shall we?" that last one says.  
"Superb idea." the first one says. "I'm starving." Emma agrees and stands up, so does Killian. Emma takes Theo out of his chair and takes him to the table. Graham, Mary Margaret and David are still sitting down.  
"Guys, we're eating." Tina says. It's very clear to Emma that they don't understand, if only she did.


	4. Chapter 4

It's a strange feeling, talking to someone in the dark. In a way it brings this freedom. It's not necessary to pay attention to your facial or body features. They are hidden safely in the dark. There's only a voice and that makes it very intimate at the same time. You pay attention to every detail. The cracks and intonation. What words they emphasize. The dark is a place where secrets come out.

"Killian, I have to thank you again. Your gift is breathtaking." Emma is already laying covered by the blankets when he gets into the bed. The opposite side of course. The light goes out. His gift has received a better reception than he ever could have wished. Since the moment he spotted it at the antiquarian's, he could only picture it in her blond locks and tonight that came true.  
"You really need to stop thanking me, Emma. You are very welcome."  
"It's really amazing." Killian doesn't need to see her to know a smile is on her face.  
"You want to hear the story behind it?" He feels the bed move. Emma turns to face him, he thinks. It's confirmed when her voice is very near to him.  
"There's a story?" she asks, full of curiosity.  
"Aye. You know about my mum. How she died when I was a wee lad?" He hears her nod through the rustling of the pillow. "She used to tell me and Liam bedtime stories. There was only one person who could tell them with so much vivacity and that was my mother." He doesn't remember much of his mother but her face, pulling the strangest faces, is something that he hopes he never forgets. "She always chose old, folkloric legends, that she knew by heart. She wanted us to retain them and tell them to our own children. My grandfather was Irish and he told my mum the best tales. My favorite story was one she heard of him. About the children of Lir. They were turned into swans by their stepmother, as usual. Nearly 900 years later, after roaming three different lakes, they were turned back by the tolling of a church bell. Seeing the pin through the glass, well, it made me think of it." He runs his finger over the silver around his thumb. Another reminder of the tale. A ring his grandfather left him, his family is very keen on heirlooms. On the inside four swans are engraved. It started out as a tribute to his mother and her family and after knowing Emma, it has become one for her as well. Not that he will ever forget how much he loves her but it can't hurt to be reminded of it. Her hand finds his and tenderly squeezes.  
"I love it even more now." She yawns. "Wow, I'm tired. I think I'm going to sleep. Good night, Killian. Thank you for an amazing day." She turns her head to the other side and takes a deep breath. He looks at the ceiling. Pointlessly. There nothing to see, the room is completely dark.

"Swan?"  
"I'm sleeping." she says. Maybe he shouldn't.  
"Just let her sleep, Killian" he thinks. "Now is not the time." He considers it. He really does, but it's all becoming too much. He can't keep it to himself anymore, she needs to know. This is long overdue.  
"I need to tell you something." Emma sighs. The darkness is pierced by the bed light and she turns towards him.  
"Go for it. But quickly." He blanks. The words he had prepared, their order and meaning have all vanished out of his mind. The illuminated room and her green eyes, staring at him paralyzes him. "Killian, come on." Emma's impatient but she is also tired. Procrastinating won't do any good. He fills his lungs with air and starts.  
"I'm in love with you. I know that it makes this situation completely not okay. I wasn't going to tell you but then I talked with Tina and she made me realize that I had to." He glances at her.  
"Tina knows? You told Tina before you told me?" That's the first thing she says.  
"Emma, that's totally besides the point. Did you hear what I said?" Emma lifts the bedcovers off of her and plants her feet on the ground.  
"What? That you're in love with me? Or the fact that you feel regretful tricking me into this. Oh god, I should've never agreed to this." She is facing the wall, her back turned towards him. Her hands come up and cover her face. "How long?"  
"Emma, it doesn't matter." He doesn't want to tell her because then he has to admit all of his feelings to her. How he fell for her right from the beginning.  
"How does it not, Killian? Please, do tell me, because I only see reasons why it could matter." Emma spins and is looking at him again. Her pajamas give the move some sort of comedic air. If he didn't know better, he'd laugh with them. Her face clearly shows that laughing is out of the question. Killian's still lying in the bed. He decides to get up.  
"I-" He can't say anything.  
"How long have you been in love with me?" The volume of the conversation elevates. At least with her.  
"Since the incident." She shakes her head. Her feet take one step back every two or three movements.  
"Fuck! I need to go." Killian can't let her leave. Not like this. He circles the bed and grabs her hand.  
"Emma, please."  
"Killian. Let. Me. Go."  
He instantly releases her hand.  
"I'm sorry." But it comes too late. She has already left the room.

* * *

Six years. He has been in love with her for six fucking years.

She's standing outside. Emma can't be in the same building as he is. Her breaths follow quickly but there isn't enough air. The pure mountain air isn't enough anymore. It feels as if she was hit by something. When someone dies that way, they call it blunt force trauma. A great speed and a grave injury leading to death. She isn't dead, but it still feels like that. She can't return, not now. What is she going to do? In her haste, she was able to grab her purse. In there she has her phone and wallet. Should she call David or Mary Margaret and ask them to come find her? She'd be forced to be with him. Killian. Emma feels relieved that his affection is equal to hers but she also feels betrayed. She doesn't want to hate him for what he did because that would be extremely hypocritical. She's uncertain of what is supposed to happen now. Her phone is ready to call anyone, she just needs to decide who. Her shaking fingers choose a number. The call is picked up after 5 rings.  
"Hello?"  
Relief and guilt are added to the mixture of emotions in her body.  
She starts crying. Every tear that rolls down her cheek is angrily wiped away. She doesn't want to cry but there are just so many emotions going through her at the moment that she sees no other option. She drowning and every time it looks like she's nearing the surface, a wave comes and drags her back.  
"Emma? Are you okay?" The voice is worried. She sobs again.  
"I'm fine. Forget that I called. Sorry I woke you" She tries to collect herself.  
"I won't. You clearly aren't fine. Why are you crying, there's no need for tears." She shivers. Her ugly pajamas aren't really helping in the cold.  
"I just need to get away from here."  
"I'll be there in five." The call stops.

It isn't even five minutes, she timed it, before she sees two lights heading towards her. She opens the door and sees Olaf's smiling face.  
"Thank you so much!" She has to keep herself from beginning to cry again. "Anywhere is better than here."  
"I'll take you home." She longs for nothing more than her own bed and her collection of heartbreak songs lying next to her stereo. She has that nice bottle of white wine she was saving and those delicious chocolate truffles that were sold for some charity. Home never sounded so seducing. But she can't make him drive all the way there. It way too far.  
"Olaf, no. It's Christmas. I already woke you and practically summoned you here. I don't want to ruin your holiday anymore." The tears are back.  
"Emma, love is putting someone else's needs before yours. Now get in the car. We have a long drive ahead."  
"I don't know how I can ever thank you." It doesn't take him long to think of an answer.  
"I like warm hugs." Emma laughs. She must look terrible with her red puffy eyes.

* * *

He calls and calls. Each and every time he is greeted by her voicemail.  
"What did you do, Killian?"  
"I told her something. I told her the truth. I am in love with her." The secret is out. Killian Jones is in love with Emma Swan.  
"We all know that." The shock he was expecting on their faces is not present. Not in the slightest bit. It's nine in the morning and he still hasn't heard anything from Emma. It's been 7 hours since their argument and he has no idea where she is. It could be that she's in the nearby town, sleeping in a bed and breakfast but she could also be lying frozen in the snow somewhere. Who knows.  
"You do?"  
"Of course. We have eyes! Why do you think we kept warning you both. Because of this." Mary Margaret says. "The whole fake thing." Maybe they should have listened. He definitely should have listened. Ingrid walks in with a box with groceries. She takes in the worried faces and David on the phone and immediately sets down the carton.  
"Is something wrong? What happened?"  
"Emma has gone missing." Graham says.  
The woman is already distressed by the news shared with her and he's only going to aggravate her with what he has to say. Killian knows now is the time to profess everything  
"Ingrid, I need to admit something. Emma and I, we're not really in a relationship." Ingrid eyes widen.  
"But." For the first time she has a loss for words. "You two were-" Killian shakes his head. Ingrid is confused, anyone can see that. Her hand covers her mouth. "Oh no. And that's why Emma left." Tears start to well up in her eyes. "I pushed you, I assumed too much." Killian has to intervene before she is lost to the weeping.  
"No, no. It was one hundred percent my fault. I lied and I pulled everyone in my stupid tale. Emma, all of you. I have caused so much trouble. I get it if you all despise me. I sure do right now." He absolutely does. If he hadn't tried to convince Emma, if he had just come clean to Cruella, they wouldn't have to go through what they are experiencing now.  
"Killian, you need to find Emma! She couldn't have gotten far without a car." Ingrid says when she has regained her calm.  
"That driver." Tina remembers. "The one with the blond, white-ish hair. I can't think of his name."  
"Olaf." Ingrid helps Tina.  
"She must've called him."  
"That doesn't help." David says. "She could already be on a plane right now." His call ended the same way as the others did and he walks back to the rest. Theo opens his arms in order for his father to take him.  
"No." Killian knows that Emma would never take a plane. She was alright with his touch to calm her down the previous flight but she wouldn't do it again alone. "She'd go by car."  
"I'll call Olaf." Ingrid gets the phone and dials the driver's number.  
"What do I do when we get word that Emma is all right? She doesn't want me, do I just leave her alone?"  
"I don't get how you two can be so oblivious." Mary Margaret's voice rises.  
"Easy, honey." David tries to calm her down. Mary Margaret who loses her temper, talk about a unique event.  
"I know, David, but this has been going on for far too long. You both love each other!" A crease appears on Killian's forehead.  
"What do you mean?"  
"Mate, how have you not noticed?" Graham says.  
Everyone in the room looks at him and Killian feels like a complete fool. Even Theo seems to be aware of his and Emma's feelings for each other.  
"I just talked with Olaf and he says that he dropped Emma off nearly two hours ago in Storybrooke. She was looking exhausted, emotionally and physically, but besides that she was okay." Killian runs his hand through his hair. He will never forgive himself for putting Emma through this.  
"That's good to hear." David cradles and kisses Theo's head. Killian can't tell what his next move should be.  
"What now?" He consults the people standing in the room, the people he trusts.  
"Now you go." Tina says and Graham adds:  
"We all go."  
Mary Margaret nods.  
"We can't continue this vacation without her. It wouldn't be the same."  
"But it's Boxing Day. How are we even getting on a flight?" Killian asks. Ingrid's hand comes up his shoulder.  
"I'll take care of it. Don't you worry about it."

And she does. Within 20 minutes two cars are lined up before the gate, ready to take them to Emma. Killian packed all of his belongings and all of Emma's things as well. He put her gifts on top and he kept the silver clasp with himself. He didn't want to see it damaged. All of the luggage has been put in the cars and the time for goodbyes has come.  
"Ingrid, I don't think we can ever repay for all that you've done. I'm so very sorry for the abrupt end to our stay."  
"Your presence was more than enough. The only thing I want is for you and Emma to solve things and maybe come back someday." She smiles and Killian sees no other possibility than to hug the woman with everything he has got. Everyone takes their turn thanking Ingrid and Mary Margaret and they even exchange numbers to share the best recipes.  
"Mate, would you be okay with me stealing the place next to your wife?" He asks David. He has a lot to discuss with Mary Margaret. Killian knows Emma so well but he's undecided about what actions he should take. Mary Margaret is the only one who might know Emma better than he does. Hopefully she can provide some guidance.  
"Alright with me. I'll go sit with Graham and Tina."  
"Thank you." He walks towards the car with Theo and his mother in it.  
"Are you joining us?" She asks when he opens the door and the two become visible.  
"I am if I may." He waits until Mary Margaret answers.  
"Of course. Sweetie, look uncle Killian is driving with us." The boy utters an exciting yelp and Killian laughs. Leave it to him to make him forget his worries for a split second.

"You are sure you don't mind me separating your family?"  
"Killian." She glances at him. "We're all family. Do you want to talk about Emma?" He nods. "What is it you're worrying about?"  
"To be quite frank, if she'll ever forgive me. What I did was terrible and she unmistakably suffered. I know I don't want to lose her. Just as long she'll have me, in whatever way she'd like, I'll be content."  
"That is quite a profession of love." Mary Margaret looks impressed.  
"It shouldn't come as a surprise considering you all apparently knew."  
"You weren't entirely subtle. It's the way you look at Emma and she looks at you. It's the look of pure, unadulterated true love." When she says that, Killian gradually understands. According to Mary Margaret, Emma's feelings for him are of the same profoundness as his. Talking to Emma has never been this important.  
"Is she ever going to forgive me?" He wants an earnest answer. Killian doesn't want to receive any false hope.  
"I'm certain that the reason why she ran away wasn't even because of the hoax. At most a little part. It was because what she felt and the confirmation that you felt it too. It scared her and so she ran. It's what she does. Or used to do. It's been awhile since anything has freaked her out to that point. Now you just need to show her that there's nothing to be afraid of."

* * *

The numbers on the clock show that it's just past noon and Emma still feels like shit. She didn't sleep once the entire car ride and when Olaf dropped her off, and after giving him a warm embrace, she closed the curtains and got into bed. When she reaches her bathroom, she discovers that she looks like shit too. Still wearing her pink and zebra print pajamas, hair a complete mess, her eyes puffy and red patches of skin on her neck. She looks like a train wreck, she feels guilty. Incredibly guilty. Emma just left without leaving her friends any hint or message where she was going. It will be hard to explain why she decided to get out of there but it has been almost 12 hours since she left and they haven't heard anything from her. She turns on her phone. Right after Olaf picked her up, she shut it off. She knew that she was going to receive calls from Killian and Emma didn't want that. As soon as she taps her pin code, the calls flood in. There are a total of 32 missed calls. 11 from Killian, 7 from Mary Margaret, 6 from David, she got 4 from Graham and four more from an unknown number. Probably Ingrid or Tina's one. There are also several voicemail messages. Emma puts her thumb against her lips. Should she listen to them? She stares at the screen.

"Emma, I know I went over the line and I'm sorry." Killian's voice says when she presses the phone icon. Another one starts playing after the beep.

"Hi, Emma. Please answer. This silence is deafening. I'll make it up to you. I am so very sorry."

"Emma, come on. Just let me know you're okay." A stern statement. The little outburst is over and his voice becomes softer. "I already miss you." After 8 messages from Killian, it's Mary Margaret's turn.

"Emma, I don't know what happened but Killian has been up for the entire night and he'd surely appreciate it if you replied."

"Come on, Emma. Respond. Give some sign of life." Then Killian's voice returns. It brings tears to Emma's eyes. He sounds so incredibly distraught.

"We're all worried sick about you, Emma. Let us know you're okay. It doesn't have to be me, any of us will do. Just answer, please." She stops the call, she can't handle more. Emma needs to let them know she's okay but not by calling one of her friends. They'll be so mad and she can't take anything else. She could try calling back the unknown number. It would be good if it was Tina's and even better if she got a hold of Ingrid. Those are the best people she can call right now. They're with the rest and they don't know Emma well enough to give her a hard time.

"Hello?" Ingrid's composed voice answers the call.  
"Hi Ingrid. It's Emma."  
"Emma, dear. We were so worried."  
"I'm very sorry I left without telling you and I ruined the entire vacation. I wanted to say that and also that I'm okay and I'm back in Storybrooke. Could you tell my friends that?"  
"Oh, but they're not here anymore." Ingrid says. Emma frowns her eyebrows.  
"They're not?"  
"They're on their way to you."  
"All of them?"  
Ingrid hums  
"Yes."  
"When did they leave?" She needs to know how much margin she has before they are in Storybrooke.  
"Two hours ago."  
"Thank you, Ingrid." Her eyes go back to the clock. "I'll definitely call you back some time later."  
"You do that and take care of yourself, Emma."  
"I will." The only question now is how. If they left two hours ago, she still has about three or four hours to do... what exactly? The only thing she really needs to do is send a message that she's alright and her friends will be happy with that, won't they? There's no need to come all the way to her apartment to check how she is if she says that she's fine. She can just send Graham and David a text. They'll tell the rest.

* * *

"David says he just received a text from Emma that says and I quote: I'm home, safe. Please don't worry about me, I'm fine. Just need some time, I guess. Emma." Mary Margaret reads the text she received from her husband.  
"I shouldn't go, should I?" If she needs time, the plan he and Mary Margaret came up with is not going to work. At all. It would be a total catastrophe.  
"What are you saying? Of course you are."  
"Mary Margaret, she just said-"  
"Emma has gotten enough time. I love the girl to pieces but she's not getting more time than she already had. I've known her long enough to know that time is not going to help. You need to go there immediately and talk it out." Mary Margaret leaves no room for dispute. "Maybe not immediately but after eating something because I'm very hungry." Mary Margaret smiles at him and Killian smiles back. Even if Mary Margaret and he don't go as far back as David and he or aren't as close as he is with Emma, he's still very lucky to be able to call her a friend.  
"Sounds good to me."

He wants nothing more than to get in his bed and sleep. He worried the entire night over Emma's disappearance and just spent 5 hours in a car, he's exhausted. But there are more important matters than sleep at the moment. Emma for instance. He's standing before her door, thinking of the best way to handle this. The one he chose last night (is it only that long ago? It feels like an eternity) was a poor one. Killian has to make sure this one is better. He reaches in his back pocket. It's still there. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. His hand knocks on the door. His heart is racing. This moment is going to be decisive for the rest of his life. She doesn't open the door but speaks through it. It seems that she's not surprised by his visit.

"Killian, I said I needed time." Emma says. She most likely looked through the small looking hole in the wood.  
"I know."  
"Great." It signals the end of the conversation. She isn't opening the door but he needs to see her.  
"Emma, wait. Can I come in for a second?"

It's silent for a while and Killian fears that she already left but eventually the door reveals the inside of her flat and Emma. Hair put up in a loose bun. Wearing an oversized sweater.

Killian has list of moments where seeing Emma entirely changes his emotions. There is the first time they met and their first real talk. The moment where he finally saw her after three months at Neverland and all the love for her returned with an even greater quantity. Emma, gorgeously dressed, dancing with him. The list goes on and he adds today, the second the relief washes over him that she is indeed alright.

They walk to her living room and she turns around, notifying him he needs to say what he needs to say.  
"I'm not asking for atonement for what I did. I just want to make sure you are indeed alright. I understand if you never want to see me again. I deserve it. I did something so idiotic and I wish I could take it back." Emma flinches but it's so fast that Killian isn't even sure it happened. "I'll go. I just want to give you this." His hand goes to his back pocket and takes the box out. "You forgot it and I know how much you liked it. I'm afraid I forgot your luggage in the car but I'm sure Mary Margaret will keep them safe for you." He lays the black square in her open hand and she closes her fingers around it. "Goodbye, Emma." This is a complete disaster. He's walking away from her. The love of his life. She didn't forgive him. She barely even talked. He wants to believe that they can go back to being friends but he just can't see how. Mary Margaret was clearly wrong. Emma's feelings aren't the same. The doorknob is grabbed by his hand and he opens the door. Killian wants to turn around so badly. He wants to see her. It may be the last time that she'd let him but he doesn't. He keeps his gaze right in front of him and closes the door. He clenches his jaw. His five fingers are joined together in a fist. He can't make himself leave the hallway.

"Killian, wait!" As soon as he hears her voice, he turns around. Emma's facial expression has completely changed. The indifference is completely gone and hurt filled its place. Her green eyes have a watery edge.  
"You regret saying you loved me?" As soon as the words leave her mouth, Killian approaches her.  
"No! Unquestionably not, Emma." She looks relieved. That's a good sign. "Ignoring the bad outcome, saying I loved you was one of the best choices I made. I regret persuading you to pretend we're together. I didn't do it with bad intentions. I'm a firm believer in good form. I just got swept away by my feelings during the act." She glances away from him.  
"I'm sorry for what I did." Killian creases his forehead.  
"What are you saying sorry for? I am the one who needs to apologize."  
"I've had some time to think about everything that happened the last 24 hours. The worst part is that I wasn't even that mad at you for not telling the truth." The tears are threatening to spill over. "I feel so guilty. I brought you and everyone so much worry. Just because I was too stubborn to stay. Too afraid of the situation. During the stay I just kept wishing that it could be real, that we could be real but that wasn't possible because you didn't love me. And then you told me you did and suddenly everything became real. I just freaked out and I didn't know what to do and so I ran. Apparently that's the only thing I'm good at." She wipes her freshly fallen tears off the apple of her cheek. "I really regret it. I was planning on staying in my apartment for an indefinite time. That way I wasn't going to be confronted with your hate."  
"Emma, why would you think we hate you? I told them what happened and they understand." He wants to take her in his arms and let no room for any feeling besides love but he can't yet. She has to say it.  
"And you? Do you hate me?"  
"No! Of course not. I love you, Emma Swan. No matter what you've done."  
"Okay, good. Because I love you too." There it was. Or there they were. The four words Killian has waited four years on. Ever since he realized that she had his heart since the beginning. He walks towards her and takes her face in his hands. They stand there. Breathing each other in, foreheads pressed against one and another. Green irises drowning in blue ones and a pair of blue eyes getting lost in green.  
"Can you forgive me?" she whispers.  
"Emma, my love, there's nothing to forgive. I do love you." Emma smiles, her cheeks still wet with warm drops. Killian takes one of his hands off her face and intertwines it with hers. "I don't think I'll get used to saying I love you."  
"I won't either." Emma goes to stand on her tiptoes and kisses him. It's the first time Killian is kissing her. For real. When he did last times he didn't know he had already captured her heart for a while. They lost so many time being so blind. If they acted sooner on it, it would most definitely have spared them some heartache. It all happened and there's nothing to do about it. It took them some time but they are together, at last. The kiss began as a soft one, a tender one but it's turning into a passionate one fast. Their tongues collide again and again and Emma moans. Killian breaks the kiss apart.

"Swan, don't take this the wrong way, I love kissing you but maybe we can do it in a more private place?" They are standing pressed against each other and the hallway's wall. An elderly lady is walking in the hall, taking in the scene before her and shaking her head. She mutters something about young people these days and disappears into her flat. Emma laughs and Killian, more because of her enamouring smile and out of pure happiness, starts chuckling as well.  
"Let's."

She opens the door to her apartment, their hands still connected and they walk in. He has been in Emma's flat enough times to know that she's leading him towards the bedroom. Killian steps over Emma's colorful pajamas from last night and goes sit on the bed. Emma starts kissing him again and puts her hands around his. Her legs do the same behind his back. They are both heavily breathing and Emma fiddles with his jumper. Their lips lose each other when the garment is lifted over his head by her, but they are soon reunited. They are both panting when Killian breaks them apart, once again.  
"Emma, this is going to sound so out of place and possibly out of character. Definitely right now. It's just that I've not slept for a long time and the only thing I can think of right now is laying my head down and sleeping." Emma can't contain herself and her laugh bubbles out of her. He doesn't mind, it's a gorgeous sound. She unlinks her legs from behind him and gets of his lap. She pushes him down and lies next to him in the bed. "Do you mind?" Killian asks. She shakes her head.  
"You're tired. We have more than enough time to do more enjoyable activities." Emma grins and winks at him."And also, it's sleeping. You really think I'm going to say no to that?"

* * *

She's lying in bed with Killian. They're facing each other and she looks up at his face. She had seen the scars that the lack of sleep and the worry had given him the moment she opened the door. Emma was expecting an angry Killian, who was going to tell her she had to leave him alone because she treated him like crap but on the contrary: he came to make sure she was okay, to tell her he would leave her alone. He loves her. He has been in love with her for over six years. Emma isn't sure when it happened for her. In a way, it's always been like this. Killian held her back to go forward with anyone else. Walsh never got an invitation for dinner with the group because of Killian. Because of him sitting at that table. She was considering Walsh's proposal even when he hadn't come to dinner. Killian was gone and she didn't know if anyone was going to love her like Walsh did. She had feelings for him but they weren't comparable to those she felt for Killian. Who was she to decline the proposal of someone who loved her and for whom she cared? Killian left to Maryland, she had to get used to life without him. Emma has never been happier about the whole Walsh fiasco. Imagine she accepted his proposal, life would be extremely different. She would have to pretend Killian Jones didn't own her heart. She doesn't anymore. She smiles to herself. They love each other. Emma traces the scar on his left cheek with her free hand. The marks of the sleep deprivation are vanishing under Emma's gaze.  
"I love you." she whispers to a sleeping Killian. She moves her body closer to him and closes her eyes as well. She knows she'll wake up with her hand linked with Killian but this time, it will not scare her. It will put her at ease.

 **A/N: The ending is cute, isn't it ;) The next chapter is the last one of this fic and the** **epilogue** **, so we are nearing the end. You can expect it in a week or so. As always reviews are very beloved by me.**


	5. Epilogue

**A/N The final chapter! The Epilogue! This is actually the first story that I've ever finished, so it's a milestone for me. This chapter is pure, and I mean like highly concentrated, fluff. It's pretty much 5400 words combined into one fluffy whole. I hope you enjoy and if you can find the little references in here towards things in past chapters, I will love you forever.**

 _ **2 years later**_

"Ingrid? Where do you want these lights?" Emma turns her head to glance at the woman. Her hands are filled with the little, purple light bulbs. Ingrid comes walking towards her and takes a look at the room.  
"What do you think if they were hung from that corner..." Her finger points at the mentioned corner and makes a swooping motion. "... all the way over there?" Emma follows Ingrid's hand and nods.  
"I think that would be perfect. I'll hang them up right away."

Christmas at Ingrid's place had soon become a tradition. The first edition didn't end in the best way but they have long forgotten about that. Now it's the thing they look forward to the most. All of them.

Emma steps down the ladder and admires her work. After a satisfied smile, she puts the ladder away. Theo races along her leg.  
"Wow! Easy, kid."  
"Uncle Killy and me playing." he gives as an explanation and runs away shrieking. Emma laughs. Theo is an incredible kid. He has slept over many times and every time he amazes Emma with new words he has learned or new songs he can sing. Her disliking of children has completely disappeared because of her godchild. Suddenly two arms come around her and spin Emma in a circle. Laughter comes out of her mouth and Theo is clapping in his hands with a big smile.  
"Gotcha." He whispers in her ear and he kisses her on the cheek.  
"Alright, you boys tricked me good. You can set me back down." Her feet feel the ground again. Killian goes to Theo and kneels down. When he raises his hand, Theo high fives Killian's with all his power.  
"Lad, you have some force in you." Theo looks proud. His big uncle Killian thinks he is strong. The toddler runs away to find his dad and tell him the news. Killian stands back up and takes Emma in his arms.  
"How are you, my love?"  
"I'm good. I hung up those beautiful, little lights." she says, the pride radiating off of her.  
"Job well done. You don't care for a walk, by any chance?"  
"Now? But it's getting dark." She doesn't see why he'd want to go outside now. It's far warmer and cozier inside, in front of the fireplace with their friends. He grins in a mischievous way.  
"I don't see how that matters. I want to take a stroll towards the lake." He and his damn lake. He fell in love with the place two years ago and now that's the only thing he does when he's here. Go on walks there. When they're back in Storybrooke, he misses the place so much he'd actually consider driving five hours just to visit it.  
"And you can't go alone?"  
"But I want to go with you, my love." He pouts his lips and uses the big guns: the puppy eyes. She has never been able to resist them, even when they weren't together. Emma sighs.  
"Alright, I'll get my coat."  
"Thank you, Swan." He has a huge smile on his face and it makes Emma's lips curl as well.  
"Ready to go?"  
"Uhuh." She slides her arm around his and they walk outside.  
"Did you and Theo have fun?"  
"Oh yes, we did. The lad is marvelous. We drew and ran outside. Then we ran some more inside. Tina and he made a puzzle while I went to recover a bit." Killian chuckles.  
"He is a handful, that's true. Mary Margaret told me that they're trying for a second child. Can you imagine that? Having two of those running around?" Emma definitely can. A black haired boy with green eyes like hers or maybe a blonde girl who would inherit the blue of her father. They had briefly discussed children before. Killian wanted them but Emma wasn't convinced yet. Now she is, 100%. She only needs to tell him.  
"I think if they can drop off the children at our place or leave them with Graham and Tina often enough, they'll do just fine. Mary Margaret and David were born to be parents." The snow crunches under their weight. "We have our two year anniversary approaching." Killian remarks. Gone is the chance to talk about her recent decision. She can tell him another time. It doesn't have to be now. Emma lays her head on his shoulder.  
"That is very true. It's strange to think it's been two years since we had a misunderstanding about the phrase 'sleep together'. You know, seeing that you literally wanted to sleep in my bed while I wanted to have hot and passionate sex with you."  
"Swan! Do you have any need for a snowball in your coat? Because we swore we wouldn't mention that again." He raises his eyebrows and calls her to see if he's daring.  
"Relax, babe. You have more than made up for it." Emma kisses him. "Also for that time where you actually fell asleep while I-"  
"That's enough!" Killian ducks and scoops a handful of snow. Sensing the threat of a freezing pile of snow being thrown at her, Emma runs away.  
"No, no! Killian, I was just joking." She tries to plead with him but fails because before she knows, a snowball hits her in the neck. She screams. The snow melts when it touches her warm skin and the cold water is now running down her back. Emma hears him chasing her and he soon catches up. So focused on him, she misses the branch in front of her feet and trips over it. Emma makes a graceful, not really, sound to accompany her fall.  
"Swan, are you all right?" Killian asks with a worried expression.  
"Fine. I'm just waiting until this situation becomes less embarrassing." Emma's still lying face planted on the ground.  
"Something you are currently failing at." Killian says while helping her up. She narrows her eyes at him. "Do you surrender?" he asks. "Because if you don't, I'll be obliged to continue the battle." He gestures towards to the powder on the ground.  
"Okay, I surrender. You know you're an idiot, right?"  
"Completely aware of that." he says while removing a twig out of her hair.  
"I love you, Killian."  
"Love you too, Swan. Let's finish our stroll and then we can eat. We should be close to the lake." They continue walking hand in hand until they reach the water. The lake hasn't frozen over yet. It still moves when the wind blows. They have their signature spot. A fallen tree near the edge. Emma instantly goes sit down but Killian keeps his distance.  
"Killian, what are you doing? Come sit with me."  
"I'll be there in a second."

* * *

This is it. The moment of truth. Out of all of the speeches he held for Emma Swan, this is going to be the most important one. The past shows that he doesn't have a great experience with them but this one will be amazing. He has prepared this moment and he knows the things he wants to say by heart. Emma's blonde hair moves with the wind and covers a part of her face. Her fingers, protected by black leather gloves, put her hair back in place. Revealing her colored cheeks and the tip of her nose, with the same light pink color. The sun hasn't set completely and its last light falls through the branches of the forest. He walks towards her and she opens her arms for him to join her. Right before Killian reaches the tree, he gets down on one knee.  
"Wow, what are you doing?" she repeats again. He takes a breath.  
"Emma Swan, I've known that you're my happy ending for more than eight years now. Every second that I'm with you reminds me that you are the most beautiful woman alive, inside and out, and that I wouldn't want to spend a second without you. How someone can ever deserve someone like you, I will never know, but I will fight to my last day to be that person. Emma, my love, will you marry me?" He opens the box and shows the ring but Emma's eyes keep concentrating on his. Killians feels the love Emma is radiating through her features. The sparkle of her eyes, the way her lips curve. He has felt it for so long, so her answer doesn't come as a surprise.  
"Yes." She lays her hand on his cheek. "I will marry you." Their foreheads touch and they are both smiling. Killian wasn't expecting a big yes moment with tears. It isn't like Emma. Her emotional moments are reserved for special places. In the warmth of their bed, curled up against each other. That's where she shares her insecurities and doubts, her vulnerability. But loving him, knowing that they will spend the rest of their lives together, was never a part of that.  
"It's getting dark, we better return." Killian says. The night is like a veil, slowly covering them and the lake. He doesn't want to ruin the moment but it will be quite difficult to find their way back in the dark. Snow starts falling through the trees.  
"Let's just stay for a while longer." Emma rubs their cold hands together. She took off her gloves. Killian kisses Emma's hand as an agreement. Her left hand, on which his mother's ring is worn with joy.

* * *

The lake completely transforms in springtime. The trees have leaves again, birds whistle their songs again and animals run around, celebrating the revival of nature. It's the perfect place to have their wedding. Ingrid started planning the instant she heard about their engagement and Mary Margaret was her right hand. It was easy for Emma. She didn't have to worry if their wedding was going to be successful, with those two in charge it definitely would be. One thing she did worry about was the guest list. For her, the wedding couldn't be a big happening with 300 guests and Killian agreed. Just their friends and some people out of town would do. Belle and Ruby, Granny, Leroy and his brothers. She just didn't want every Storybrooke citizen to be present. As long as everyone they truly cared about was there. She made that clear to Mary Margaret. Several times.

Mary Margaret comes through the door of Emma's usual bedroom in the mansion. The entire house was provided by Ingrid for Emma to prepare herself. Which was crazy. Emma only needed a room to change, but Ingrid insisted. The ideal preparation for Emma would be one she did herself. Quickly, without fuss and not too exaggerated. She didn't need people to fret over her. Then she saw Mary Margaret's behavior, how the wedding really did something with her best friend, so she tried to make an exception. Let her make up be done, choose jewels out of the diverse collection in the jewel box. Be a princess getting prepared for her first ball. Mary Margaret's fondness of weddings and wedding traditions betrays what comes next.

"Each and every wedding needs it. Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue."

"I already took care of some of that." Her homework was done. "The stone on my ring is blue." Emma says. "My hairpin is vintage and my dress is new. I'm only missing something borrowed." Mary Margaret walks towards her and opens Emma's hand. She lays two pearl earrings in them.  
"I was expecting you to say that. Now, you can get married." Her friend's eyes get teary and Emma puts the earrings on the table. Her now free hand takes Mary Margaret's.  
"You okay?" She shrugs.  
"The earrings. They were mom's and you are wearing them while getting married. You're all grown up. We all are but I can still see the girl with the packet of Twizzlers. Mom and Dad would be very proud of you, Emma." Emma never called her adoptive parents mom and dad. It felt too strange after living for over 12 years without any family to suddenly have one. But they were. Leopold and Eva, the loving parents she always longed for and Mary Margaret, the most caring best friend/ sister she could have ever imagined. The Blanchards were and still are incredible people. Emma misses them everyday. It has never been easy but she and Mary Margaret are still together and that's the most important part.  
"I hope so. It's because of them and you that I'm sitting here today. Thank you. For everything." They both stay like that. Emma sitting down and Mary Margaret standing behind her, both with damp eyes.  
"I'll put your hair up. It makes you look graceful." Her crafty hands take the blond locks and Emma closes her eyes. Her hair is moved in every direction until Mary Margaret speaks. "Perfect." she says. Emma looks at her reflection and regrets ever protesting complete it, she takes the swan and softly slides it in. Emma couldn't agree more. She actually looks like the princess, ready to meet her prince. Although Killian would insist he is more a pirate than he is a prince.

The names of the bridesmaids and groomsmen weren't that big of a surprise. Mary Margaret is the maid of honor and Tina is a bridesmaid. Graham is standing besides Killian as his best man and David is walking Emma down the aisle and also acting as Killian's groomsman. Her bridesmaids both have huge smiles on their faces. Emma chose a soft green for their dresses to satisfy both of them. Long trains and veils aren't necessary for Emma. Her dress is simple but elegant. Up close, the embroidery becomes visible. It runs across her dress like a flowered vine. The music starts and David looks at her.  
"You ready?"  
"More than." She is aching to see Killian. They were separated yesterday evening by Mary Margaret and Graham.

"No. Why can't he stay?"  
"Emma, it's tradition." Mary Margaret reasoned.  
"We are so far from traditional people."  
"I don't care. You're coming with me." Mary Margaret insisted.  
"Emma, it's all right." Killian grinned. "I'll see you at the aisle."  
"I guess you will." They quickly shared a peck and he followed Graham.  
"Until tomorrow, my love." Before he was gone, he winked at her and left Emma with a smile.

She sees him and the smile is back. The nerves she was feeling before all cease to exist the moment their eyes meet. Killian softly shakes his head like he can't believe that this situation is real. Emma understands him. To, after all these years, be able to marry him wasn't really something she'd expect. Every step she takes, is a step closer to an entire life with Killian and there isn't anything she wants more. They both keep the connection between their eyes. It's telling her so much about what he's feeling at the moment. He always claims that he can read her like an open book but the skill is one they both master. It doesn't take more than a glance to know what he's feeling or thinking. Now the only thing she can see is complete happiness. David guides her to right in front of Killian and gives her to him. There's no need for the protective friend speech because it is Killian. He loves Emma profoundly.  
"You're wearing blue." she whispers to him. Emma might have mentioned a few times that blue is her favorite color on him. Killian raises his eyebrow.  
"You are wearing white."  
"Yes, and I'll kill you if you spill anything over me." She doesn't need a repeat of 8 years ago.  
"Don't worry, I'll be cautious. I must say you look absolutely heart-stopping." Emma's smile widens even more.  
"Thank you. So do you." Their little bubble is burst by a voice.  
"Um, guys?" Archie says. "Can we begin?" They both laugh.  
"Of course."  
"Sure." Emma takes her place, facing Killian and the ceremony begins.

"Someone once told me that we had this pure, unadulterated true love." Emma has her suspicions about the person who said that to her almost-husband. "That's quite the statement." Killian chuckles. "But it's also completely correct. Every time I see you, Emma Swan, I see late evenings with rum and early mornings with hot chocolate _and_ cinnamon." That last part causes laughter among their guests. "I see Disney movies and I hear quiet whispers in the dark. I see heated arguments, because you can't really expect anything else with our tempers. I see walks around town and Theo's smile when you play with him. And it hit me. In an instant I understood. It's you. It has always been you and it will always be you. The woman I love. The woman I want to spend the rest of my days admiring, fighting for, looking at, being with."  
"There you have the waterworks." Emma brushes the tear running down her face away, but soon it is replaced by two new ones.  
"Emma, if you're ready." Archie says. She nods.  
"I am." Emma turns to Killian.  
"Killian. I spent a long time thinking about what I should tell you here. I could say that I love you but you know that. I could say that I want to spend my life with you but you know that too. I just couldn't find anything to say and then I found the reason why. You already know everything. You know me. You helped me. You got rid of my walls. Walls that were nearly impossible to tear down, but you did it. Knowingly and unknowingly. In many ways I was back to being an orphan. I had friends, people who loved me but I was missing a home. I've found that now. Me falling asleep in your arms each night is home to me and me waking up to an empty bed but with the smell of coffee is home. You're my home." It seems like every person in the room currently has tears in their eyes. They are streaming generously with Emma and Killian wipes his eyelid with his hand.  
"Can I have the rings?" Archie asks. A sniffling Mary Margaret signals her child. Theo walks over to them. His face is distinguished by concentration. He is taking his job as ring bearer very serious. He halts right before the couple. He looks up with a concerned expression.  
"Auntie Emma, why you crying?"  
"Don't worry about it, honey. It's happy tears." Emma runs her hand in his blond hair. "Thank you." Archie takes the rings and hands Emma the larger one. She slides it over Killian's ring finger. Another ring gets added to her left hand by Killian.  
"You may kiss the bride." Killian follows Archie's instruction and places his lips on Emma's. The crowd cheers and Emma can't stop smiling. Not that she wants to.  
"I love you, Killian Jones."  
"I love you too, Emma Swan-Jones."

* * *

"Darlings" Killian knows that accent all too well. Cruella. It isn't really a surprise that she is present. They did send her an invitation. "It was a wonderful service. I do wish you'd let me decorate the party because it's looking a bit... bland. Oh well." Cruella shrugs. "Is that a Dalmatian I see there?" Emma and he turn heads and see Pongo standing there with Archie. When they look back at his boss, she has disappeared.  
"Should we feel offended that she thinks the party's dull? Or relieved?" he asks Emma. She raises her shoulders.  
"I have no clue. Archie has to look out because I don't trust her in the slightest bit with that dog." They glance back and it looks like Archie is being overwhelmed by Cruella. The thing she does best. "I need to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back." Emma leaves his side and he walks over to Tina, standing alone at a table. She's savoring one of Ingrid's appetizers and smiles when he joins her. Killian unconsciously starts to toy with the new ring around his ring finger. Tina's look goes down to his hand, twirling the ring.  
"I can't wait to get married too." she says.  
"Do you think it's going to happen soon? You two have been in a serious relationship for some time now."  
"I know it's going to happen." Killian raises his eyebrow and she answers his question. "Graham isn't really someone you can call subtle."  
Killian knows about that.  
"An elephant is more subtle." Tina laughs.  
"Right after we heard you two were getting married, he kept asking if I'd like to get married someday. I replied yes every time because that's the truth. Three weeks ago, I was doing laundry and I was putting some socks of his in our drawer. Guess what I found. A ring. He must've bought it the week before that because I did the same thing before and there wasn't anything yet." Graham has plans to ask Tina to marry him. How great.

"Now you only have to await the big moment. Knowing Graham, it will not take long before-"

"Little brother!" Killian turns around to the person that interrupted Tina and his conversation. There's only one person that could call him that, but it just can't be. And yet it is. His face has aged whereas his hair, the curls he inherited from their mother still have the same dark color as Killian's.

"Liam? You came." He embraces his brother. Killian is completely amazed by the person standing before him.

"Of course. It's my little brother's wedding. I'm not going to miss that. It's been far too long."  
"It has. How long have you been here?" Killian didn't notice the presence of his brother during the ceremony or right after it.

"Long enough to know that you've done well, little brother. Emma seems incredible and she clearly loves you." Normally, Killian hates it when his brother call him that but now, Killian is too delighted to be bothered by a mere adjective.

"I am indeed unbelievably lucky with her."  
"Are you talking about me?" Emma is standing in hearing distance of him and his brother, still looking simply magnificent. Her face glowing with a smile. She slowly walks towards them and links her hand with his.

"I am, my love. Swan, I'd like to introduce you to my brother Liam. Liam, this is Emma." Emma uses her other hand to shake Liam's and nods to him.

"Nice to finally meet you, Liam." She stresses the finally and smiles at him in an indecipherable way.

"It really is, Emma." Again, an odd emphasis with which Killian doesn't know what to do. His eyebrows crease microscopically but the unusualness vanishes as quickly as it came. Tina is still standing at the table and is joined by Graham and Theo holding his hand. The boy spots Emma and nearly tackles her.

"Weird, it feels like there something on my leg." A soft shake with it provokes a suppressed giggle with Theo. In one swift motion, Emma grabs their nephew and whirls him in the air. The muffled sound has soon become catching, reverberating laughter. Theo escapes her hold and sprints away. Emma, long gotten rid of her heels, runs barefooted in the grass behind him. Killian smiles. He just needs to wait a little bit longer.

"I see you have found the right person to wears Mum's ring. A swan, no less." Liam grins with the memory of their mother and the stories she told.

"I have, brother, I have."

"You remember how to do this?"  
"I had a great teacher." They start moving together, on the notes of the music.  
"I'm still amazed that my brother is actually here. He said he couldn't come."  
The disappointment was big with Killian when Liam told him he couldn't come because of his work. His brother explained him that he attempted everything to get time off, but his boss just wouldn't let him. Killian tried not to let it ruin the day but he was upset that the only family he had couldn't come. Noticing his sorrow, Emma embraced him. She ran her hands through his hair and tenderly promised him that his other family, the one that was here, would be there for him. After she said that, a kiss was planted on his forehead, then one on both of his cheeks. Her lips grazed his nose and stopped on his. They softly made love until the ache mostly had disappeared.

"I might've made a few calls and convinced a few people to let him come as a surprise." Emma admits. The strange moment from earlier today suddenly makes sense. They communicated without him knowing. Emma is the reason why his brother is here. Killian didn't think he could love her even more and still, in this moment, he does.  
"You are infallible, my love." Emma lays her head in the fold of his neck. Other couples start to join them but it's still like they are the only people in the room.

* * *

Olaf had insisted on singing a song at the party and Emma saw no other option than to let him. He would bring his good mood and there couldn't be anything better than that. She's curious about what exactly he has planned. To get the best view of the performance, Emma and Killian were seated right in front of the stage.  
"Hello, my name is Olaf. The reason we are gathered here today is such a wonderful one. Some people are worth melting for and I think Killian and Emma can both agree that that's the case with them. I don't know why but I've always loved the idea of summer, so I'll be singing a song about it." Killian raises his eyebrows at her expectantly and Emma takes a nervous breath. A singing Olaf is not something she has heard before. As soon as Olaf starts singing, he astonishes the entire party. The feeling he brings to a song about a season is incredible. He sings the big finish and right after he's done, he is greeted by a big applause and cheers.  
"You would think that after two years his oddness would stop to surprise me, but it has not. In any way. Did you know he could sing like that?" Emma shakes her head.  
"No, absolutely not. That man is so special and needs to be protected at all costs." She goes over to Olaf to give him the thing he likes most: a warm hug.

"Emma, dear. How are you liking the party?" Ingrid asks Emma. She is eating from her plate filled with all kinds of food while Killian went to his brother. She decided to give them some time to catch up. Emma hurries to swallow the food in her mouth and answers.  
"Ingrid, it's incredible. Better than I, than we, could've imagined in our wildest dreams. Thank you."  
"By now you should know that it's my complete pleasure. I'm already thinking about things we can do for next Christmas." Emma is so happy that they managed to make Christmas such a wonderful time of the year for Ingrid, just like it should be. The entire group is so grateful towards her. She opens up her house each year for them to stay in and they're even welcome to join her outside of Christmas.  
"Right, Christmas, about that. Ingrid, I think we have to change some things." Ingrid's smile vanishes and worry appears.  
"Is something wrong?"  
"No, everything is fine. You'll just have to prepare for a party of eight next year." Ingrid forehead stays creased. "There's a little baby joining us." Ingrid's eyes light up.  
"You're pregnant?" she says, her voice full of disbelief. Emma moves her head up and down.  
"Yes, almost three months."  
"Oh my." Ingrid puts her hand before her smiling face. "Congratulations! I'm so excited for you. Is Killian happy?" Emma smiles. When she told him, his reaction was priceless. Emma was calmly sitting in bed, legs crossed while he was picking up the marbles Theo left on the ground on their last playdate. She called his name and he looked up with a smile. Emma said the three words and out of complete shock, he dropped all of the gathered marbles. He stared at her, then his look went to the ground and the marbles on it and back to her. The shock dimmed down and the joy grew. He jumped on the bed, nearly tackling her with kissEs and the big smile on his face.

"He really is. He's been longing for a child to spoil and protect for forever. Killian and I also need to ask you something else, Ingrid. We're searching for a godmother for our baby." Emma lays her hand on her fairly flat belly. "Would you like to be his or hers?"  
"Of course, Emma! I'd be honored. A little baby, wow. Do you think it's going to be a he or a she?"  
"I have a feeling but whatever it is, we'll be very happy when they're here." Emma knows that, with a father like Killian and a godmother like Ingrid, her kid, boy or girl, is going to be spoiled to a great extent but she doesn't mind. There's no limit on the love a child can receive.

* * *

"Wait, I'll light ours." He walks towards Emma and lights the lantern in her hand. The sun had settled and let the night determine the further events. Emma and Killian have written a wish on the lantern in Emma's hand. One for their future life. One for happiness. They asked their guests the same. Write something down. A wish, a word, poems, hopes and dreams. It doesn't matter, as long as it has a meaning for the person that wrote it.

"It's beautiful." The glow of the flame lights up Emma's face.  
"Aye, that it is." he says while taking in the beauty of his wife.  
"You ready to let it fly?" It would be dangerous to light the lanterns in the middle of the forest, so they went back to Ingrid's house and the open space around it. Emma and he went to stand on the balcony, the rest is standing downstairs with their eyes directed at the night sky.

"I am." Both of their hands slowly raise the flickering paper and let it up in the air. Their lantern leads the way and the others follow. It's the perfect way to end the party. He lays his hand of his wife's abdomen. Gods, he would never tire of calling her his wife.  
"How's our little one tonight? Is the lad or lass enjoying our festivities?"  
"He or she is still too small for me to know that, Killian. Ask me about that in two months, I'll be sure to tell you."  
"How are you, my love?" He goes to stand behind her and wraps Emma in his arms. Her head comes to rest against his collarbone and she sighs.  
"Good. Happy. But also tired."  
"You want to go straight to bed after this?" He sees her hair move rather than her head. A lock slips out of the swan pin.  
"Yes, let them party. I want to sleep."  
"You do know that sleeping on a wedding night is worse than the times I slept instead of seducing you."  
Emma turns around and points a finger at him. The smile on her face betrays her amusement.  
"Don't you even try. That's like completely out of the question. I'm creating human life inside of my abdomen. It doesn't compare to the times you fell asleep on me."  
"I could try." His shoulders rise and his face has the same smile as his wife.  
"Good thing I love you." Emma says while sheltering herself back in his embrace.  
"Let's go inside, my life-creating, gorgeous wife." He kisses her head.  
"Let's, my idiotic and sometimes attractive husband."  
"I'll have you know, Swan, that I'm a very dashing rapscallion."  
"Of course you are."

 **Extra A/N: did you find them? I'll help you on your way: the lanterns are one of them ;). I'd like to thank you again for reading/liking/reblogging/reviewing this fic. I am so happy this many people liked it. It's a bittersweet feeling ending a story, but I have at least two more stories going on right now, so I'll focus on those. And to Amanda. I hope you liked your CSSS gift.**


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